Atrocious handwriting

Printed exercise sheets for Twin I. Photo by CallMeCreation.com

My kids have atrocious handwriting that was not corrected in school because they had been at home for 2 years. I was too busy to pay attention to their handwriting and I didn’t know how to help them. My mother and their dad have bad handwriting so I thought it could be just that.

However, it was already Twin I who asked me for help so I had to sit up and pay attention. I remember when I was in third and fourth grade we had handwriting classes where we were taught cursive handwriting. We had writing exercises in which we shadowed the handwriting of our teacher or what was in our exercise book. So I downloaded some exercise sheets for my daughter to practice on. Hopefully this would help.

I had tried to imitate the neat handwriting of some of my artistic classmates but eventually I developed my own form/style. My father had beautiful handwriting, so did my older sister and brother. My brother’s handwriting is similar to my father’s.

I could say my handwriting is ok and oftentimes my notes are neat, even when I’m doing interviews or listening to conferences/seminars/lectures. I remember my high school and college classmates borrowing my notes because 1) they’re comprehensive; and 2) they’re neat. This skill helped me now in my note-taking as a reporter, especially when there are disputes with those complaining about my reportage. My editors in London or HK ask me to send my notes to them for defense. If my notes are unintelligible, I would have a bigger problem. So I have kept all my reporter’s notebooks from 15 years ago as they stand in court, in case someone sues me. That’s the power of good note-taking—and alongside that is good handwriting.

So I need to train my children how to take notes and improve their handwriting.


Meanwhile, my other children…

Sushi lounging on my bed while I’m working my ass off. Photo by CallMeCreation.com

So far they haven’t destroyed anything this week and last week. But they chewed on Twin I’s school exercise lying around so that’s her fault for being untidy. 🙄

Oh yeah, I have to trim their claws and give them a bath. And shop for supplies again. Ah, the things you do for your pets. 😶


My post about Radiowealth had really gone viral. 7k likes and 5.6k shares. My neighbor sent me a screenshot of my post that has been passed around in Ateneo. One of my sources also sent me a screenshot of it that is being passed around in his Rotary Club.

Of course, the BBM camp is not remiss in their duty in bashing me. So I posted this today, translated in English:

BBM people have been sharing my post about Radiowealth and attacking it, saying the site I shared (blogspot has no SSL certificate etc). The main questions remain, is it true that Marcos grabbed businesses he, his family and his cronies benefited from it? Is it true that we began to sink with the debts we incurred because of his graft and corruption? There was a BBM supporter who sent me a private FB message disputing my statements, that the closure of Radiowealth was not politically motivated but it was about the radioactivity posed by the TVs. 🤔 I had watched on our Radiowealth TV for long hours and until now I’m still alive. I haven’t transformed into an X-men. There were so many requesting FB friendship but NO, I don’t care about them. I’ve had so much experience with internet trolls. I just delete and delete friend requests and PMs. For fact-checking purposes here are links:

https://www.philstar.com/other-sections/starweek-magazine/2013/01/27/901409/domingo-guevara-road-industrialization

https://ph.news.yahoo.com/remembering-dmg-self-made-entrepreneur-091445720–finance.html

https://www.elib.gov.ph/details.php?uid=722235afc2209d5ce5dc064e1127bac3&fbclid=IwAR24bXlm6coSvRDSeDj1POyItA8dg-ZpYsxRehYflC3-tl7uu40kWC9xe2E

https://catalogue.nla.gov.au/Record/2006068

There was one fact checker from Tsek.ph (group of volunteer Philippine journalists) who messaged me on Twitter and said they went through my post and marked it True. I wanted him and the world to know that I am a journalist and I do my research well. I don’t make claims lightly. Plus, I clearly remember interviewing one lolo who mentioned this to me, it was also discussed in one of my broadcasting classes, plus my father told me about this. <<< well this last one doesn’t count as an empirical evidence but this was the one that prompted me to research about Radiowealth.

As I said before, media literacy must be taught in elementary and high school so people can be taught critical thinking and not just be brainless consumers of mass media information. It’s my advocacy. However, it’s hard now that I’m no longer in the academe. The lectures and media trainings have stopped during the lockdowns and that TV interview I had earlier this month was one of the few I did in the last two years.

I have a feeling I will have my other foot back again in academe soon…🤔

Art therapy working

As I said yesterday, I will pick myself up today. Art has helped me channel my anger into something more productive. I chose a difficult subject so I can concentrate on it and in the end it was all worth it.

I sketched in between editing stories. It took me almost an hour to finish the pencil sketch because there were so many adjustments. I was debating whether I do a wet-in-wet or layering. I decided on layering so it took me several hours to finish this because I needed each layer to be dry before I do darker coloring.

Making slow progress. Art and photo by CallMeCreation.com

I really have to master wet-in-wet to produce a smoother color gradation. In the meantime, wet-in-dry layering would suffice.

I’m happy with the results. Art and photo by CallMeCreation.com

I’m excited with what I can do when I have the Kuretake Gansai Tambi. 🥰

I took it easy today, edited only a couple of stories and did not exert effort to write my own (I’ll do that next week). So I played with my cats more.

Kimchi trying to be cute. Photo by CallMeCreation.com
She continued to beg for some petting. Photo by CallMeCreation.com

I haven’t attempted drawing my cats. If I do draw my cats, I’ll make them into cartoons 😄

Meanwhile, my new 10-year passport arrived and I’m stuck with that ugly passport photo for a decade. The good thing is I can now fly to Singapore once I get the go signal from my bosses. Our company is already implementing return-to-office (RTO) in phases so it would take a while before I can fly to our different offices. Except for HK as its government (or Beijing for that matter) is still having delusions that they can keep up with the zero-Covid policy. My colleague in Shanghai was complaining to me that he had to cut short work yesterday to shop for supplies because they’re going to have another lockdown and mass testing.

In a related development, I had been looped in the entire communication thread of another platform in our company and it seems like I have another reporter placed under my wing. He was the one who I had helped with raising funds for his daughter’s hospitalization and burial. So today I gave him two assignments to pursue and gave him the agencies he needs to talk to, the questions, the angles to pursue. It seems like I need to co-write that story with him.

I have to attend a lot of conferences and meet people so I can be in the loop when it comes to the topics published by that platform since I will be straddling two titles now.


So my plan to go to National Art Museum and Intramuros is thwarted as the girls will be spending the weekend with their dad. I think I’ll just take advantage of their absence by staying home, catch up on some sleep, and finish pending tasks like the curtain panels that I should be finishing but had just been stewing on my other table for 10,000 years. My girls asked me why do I keep on beautifying the apartment when we’re moving soon anyway? I said as long as we’re here, I want my environment to be pretty and enjoyable. I mean, I’ve been through hell and back (and back). Might as well make myself happy now and not wait until when we’re in our new home. I planted morning glory seeds and now they have grown and soon the plants will be creeping on the trellis and the courtyard will be filled with flowers. I have no idea what the colors will be. It doesn’t matter; I will leave them here when we move.

Photo from Almanac.com

We live in the NOW, not for the tomorrow, not for yesterday. So might as well make myself happy now even if it means I would be dismantling everything soon when we move. I have exactly 12 months to enjoy what I have created here.

I should remind myself that I do not live in the yesterday as well, that he already belongs in the past and he should no longer hurt me. But I can’t help it that at times I get angry that he gave me so much hell.

I hope I no longer experience basura days and I no longer get triggered. I will no longer talk about him with friends. I don’t know if I could avoid this with my shrink though.

I’ll just cook for my friend K tomorrow. It makes me happy that somebody else is happy with my cooking. Love in a pot.

Stress

The lawsuit threat was still being dealt with until this morning and I was a bit stressed by it but it’s mostly the fault of the PR for talking too much. But still we need to be careful in these markets that do not have free press because they think reporters can just be pushed around. They don’t know how to deal with independent media.

Ah Kimchi, keeping me from working again this afternoon. Photo by CallMeCreation.com

To add to my stress, my HSBC credit card was hacked and some dude in the US used my card to order from GoPuff—a grocery delivery service in the US—which clearly I do not have any use for. I had HSBC cancel my credit card to be replaced and I filed a dispute, showing proof that I used the same credit card on the same day to physically buy something here in Makati. I hope the bank can prove to the merchant that it was an unauthorized transaction since it was almost PHP 7,000. Whoever that bastard is may he fall on the sidewalk and break his ankle. I just received an email this afternoon that the HSBC held the amount until the dispute is resolved.

To relieve me of stress, I finished this watercolor sketch.

Panglao, Bohol., October 2019. Photo by CallMeCreation.com

And I began a new one.

Rough sketch. Angono, Rizal. Art and photo by CallMeCreation.com
First layer. Art and photo by CallMeCreation.com

This is just the first layer. I need to do three layers of this because this scene is supposed to be very dark. I cannot do wet-on-wet coloring because this would come out muddy. Mixing colors and doing wet-on-wet painting is a disaster for me. Only professionals can do that.

I need to buy more brushes because it seems like small nylon brushes for fine lining cannot do the work for me. They do not absorb water enough. My other brushes are ok since I don’t do large formats yet.

Maybe I should do this, no?

Image from Pinterest

I’ve been studying several styles of sketching and these days I just do either ink and watercolor or pure watercolor. I should explore this type of sketching.

Photo from Pinterest

I need to practice and practice everyday.

Tomorrow I will bring the girls to UP Town to play at Timezone while I practice urban sketching again. I also want to look at brushes and more watercolor paper (at least 300 gsm) because I am heavy on washes.

I wanted to return to walking in UP but Twin I said their dad does that everyday and I don’t want to encounter him there. So I guess we’ll just do our walkathon or biking at BGC on Sunday and then have breakfast there??? Until we transfer to my hometown, our only choices for such activities would be UP and BGC.

Speaking of going out, next week Kr and I would attending separate press conferences and we’ll just meet in Ayala Center again. Now I’m thinking of having that co-working membership and have a Manila office. At least I won’t be a floating entity here as I am not based in Singapore even if I would be head of the regional bureau. Let’s see how fast these face-to-face events would come back. I don’t know what’s more convenient for us: to have a co-working space membership or we just plop down in coffee shops since we have irregular hours anyway.

Meanwhile, all the political rallies of Leni Robredo had been blockbusters. Each province is trying to outdo one another, even if hurdles were put in place by the local government units allied with Bongbong Marcos, people still find ways to join them. The image here below is from Bacolod City.

Photo from Facebook

That’s why Marcos’ camp has been showering LGU heads with bribe money so that they can help in cheating in May. This kind of people turnout happened in Bulacan, Iloilo and Cavite.

This gives me hope.

None of the Marcos-Duterte rallies had this kind of response. And most of the attendees were given incentives to attend (cash or goods) whereas Robredo’s followers are all volunteers. It has been documented.

The surveys by SWS and Pulse Asia are skewed as they are commissioned by political parties. They have not even shown their methodologies—which is why the UP School of Statistics called out those surveys. They’re mind-conditioning strategies.

Media literacy

My best friend, who is teaching in UP, has been consulting me about some TV guesting in a show where she is an executive producer. The topic was “fake news” and the elections then our conversation drifted to media literacy and society. Then she said my ideas were perfect for the show so she onboarded me as one of the guests just talking about it. It’s funny because I only have a master’s degree on this while she has a PhD. Hahaha! She says I’m on the ground as a media practitioner so I have real-world application.

As a half-assed academic (or former academic), I do have my moments. 😂

I will be on air on the 21st.


Cradling Kimchi while I worked. Photo by Twin I.

I’ve been surrounding myself again with things I love to lift my mood. Recalling the horrendous days when I unearthed a lot of information and relating to my shrink my feelings and the roller coaster ride I experienced the entire month of Feb had undone me this week. Because I had been suppressing them so I can function but out of necessity I had to dig for them again. I just wish it would just end now. I had been squishing my cats today as a stress reliever. I also watered and trimmed my plants, which are blooming again. Woooohooo!

Photo by CallMeCreation.com
This was supposed to be dying a few months ago but it has now bloomed again. Photo by CallMeCreation.com
My variegated mini roses in bloom again. Photo by CallMeCreation.com
Photo by CallMeCreation.com

After a day of editing, transcribing interviews, and writing an article, some quiet preoccupation is needed. Like tending to my plants or drawing.

Initial sketch. Panglao island, Bohol. Art and photo by CallMeCreation.com

Ok I just had a lengthy discussion with some editors this late at night because a company is threatening to sue us because my boss didn’t edit the story properly. It’s a long story but she really doesn’t edit and fact checks and stuff. My hands have always been tied because I cannot usurp my boss even though she’s effing up.

Sigh. I need to destress. I’ll start coloring this sketch above. Thank God for watercolor sketching.

UPDATE:

Disaster

Brent was quoted $12.73 higher at $130.84, while U.S. crude rose $9.92 to $125.60.   © Reuters March 7, 2022 09:12 JSTUpdated on March 7, 2022 11:54 JST

Brent crude hits $130 a barrel; Nikkei plunges

U.S., Europe ban on Russian products and delayed Iran nuclear talks spark fears

A friend posted on Instagram the cost of filling up his SUV. It’s more than PHP 3,000 = the cost of a new tire. Another friend posted that Grab Car costs PHP 500 from Mandaluyong to QC.

It’s really getting out of hand. By tomorrow, gas would increase by at least PHP 5 a liter. It’s going to be a nightmare for basic goods and services.

When Nikkei dropped this morning, I was able to buy ETFs in a momentary dip and it climbed back up before the market closed. Good for my portfolio, bad for the rest of the country overall.

I would be attending a webinar tomorrow by another global investment bank about this Ukraine crisis and how it is affecting ASEAN. At the same time, I have a regional conference to attend tomorrow until Friday and I’m still figuring it out how to split myself into three persons since I also have a press conference on Wednesday and a couple of deadlines.


I was craving for fish. And sushi. So I made some for our dinner.

I finally bought again a bamboo rolling mat. Photo by CallMeCreation.com
Maguro sashimi. I bought frozen tuna from SaveMore last week. Photo by CallMeCreation.com

I made a dip with soy sauce and roasted ginger and wasabe. Mmmmmmmm 🥰 I seared the surface of the tuna on a hot pan but it’s still raw inside.

For those who did not like raw tuna, I made Spam-egg rice rolls.

Now I ran out of ingredients to make gimbap/maki on a whim. I always must have these ingredients on hand if I suddenly craved for such. I also have on my Lazada cart dashi powder and I’m still searching for bonito flakes so I can make other Japanese dishes. I still have a tub of soybean paste for soups.


Kimchi keeping me from working this morning. Photo by CallMeCreation.com

So my cats wouldn’t want me to work. This morning Kimchi kept me from opening my notebooks and I was about to lead a meeting in a few minutes after this photo was taken. Such an obnoxious cat.

All they want to do is hang out with Mommy. Photo by CallMeCreation.com

They just want my attention. 😂 Just like the girls.


Spoke with my shrink an hour ago or so and I related the latest hiccup in my psychotherapy (i.e. the painting and the subsequent anxiety attack that ensued). She said she is keeping the current dosage of my alprazolam because she is unsure whether another similar incident would occur in the very near future that could send me into a tizzy and derail my recovery. I told her about my propensity for buying stuff to make me feel better. She said it’s ok as long as it’s under control. When she says “under control”, it’s relative to how bipolar people spend—when they’re in their mania stage (very happy), they would spend so much that they would run their credit card to the maximum credit limit. In my case, it’s the opposite; I soothe my hurt feelings (very down on serotonin) to boost my morale and I’m not spending much vis a vis my income.

She says just continue with my art therapy and always have my support system so when I get derailed I won’t sink. She also said she is validating my feelings towards the incident and I have a very good reason for feeling that way. She said it is very understandable. And she says it’s very strange that after 14 months he sends something like that when I am already trying to live my own life so it’s hard to gauge what the intention was/is. Hence, she is keeping the same dosage for my meds because the situation is unpredictable and we wouldn’t know if I would have another anxiety attack if I get triggered again for some reason. She also recommended that I go out regularly to distract me and have a healthy relationship with society.

Probably I’ll go out on Thursday or Friday and work in some coffee shop under the trees. There used to be a coffee shop at Vargas Museum in UP where I worked from time to time. Or I’ll book a diving session at Dive Plunge Club to release energy.

Horror story

Gas is very expensive. Photo by CallMeCreation.com

This is a horror story all too real. I feel bad for the jeep, taxi, Grab and all delivery guys out there who are very reliant on gas for their livelihood. The middle class is already hurting too but it’s the little guys who are bleeding right now.

Aside from food costs, some bourgeoisie concerns are hitting me right now. The price of cat little went up by PHP 50 per 10 L so it’s now PHP 300. It’s a 17% increase. Cat food (Special Cat by Monge) rose by I think PHP 10-20 per kg. Earlier I was thinking of going to Cartimar Pet Center in Pasay to get wholesale prices but I decided against it because it is 12 km away from my house. But now that the prices have shot up, I think going to Pasay is going to be worth it in the end.

I think I’m going to be shocked by the prices of veggies on Tuesday when I go to UP to buy our weekly supply.

Yes, I bought a new laser pointer to drive the cats crazy again. Photo by CallMeCreation.com

Having pets is expensive and it’s a life-long commitment. You don’t get a dog or a cat just because—and then give it away or resell it because you’re moving away or you grew tired of them. That’s just too cruel. The pets bond with you. These cats look to me as their mommy (a hairless mommy cat) and being abandoned by a second time would truly break their hearts. Last night Kimchi was waiting for us by the window when we arrived from Makati.

Their scratching post that I just repaired tonight. Photo by CallMeCreation.com

It’s like being a parent to real kids. You provide them with a stimulating environment so they can thrive. That’s the reason why I don’t want to get a dog in the city. I want my dogs to roam around freely in my yard and they can run whenever they want. When I still lived in my hometown, it was not a problem since they had like 200 sqm of front and backyard all to themselves. Vets are plenty since the College of Veterinary Medicine is just right there. The dean was my friend’s mom so getting treatment at the vet hospital was not difficult. I had a number of vet friends that I can call for pet medical emergencies.

When I was about to submit my application to UP, my dad urged me to consider taking vetmed since I had a menagerie and he thought it’s where my interests lie. I briefly thought about it but I could not imagine dealing with animals day in and day out vs writing and chasing stories 24/7. I chose the latter. Plus I don’t like organic chemistry and there was no way I can avoid it when I take vetmed. If it’s any consolation, my mom also struggled with organic chemistry in her undergrad years. She took it twice. I aced my general chemistry during my undergrad but anything beyond that did not make sense to me. That’s why I struggled with some parts of limnology when we got to the part of hydrogen sulfide toxicity levels and fish kills because I couldn’t map out properly the chemical reactions especially in aquaculture-heavy bodies of water where the rate of eutrophication is high. I understand the concept but when we go to the nitty-gritty of it…hah! Computing for dissolved oxygen at the bottom of Taal Lake was a nightmare for me in one particular exam where I failed.

Anyway, I digressed.

I’m finding ways now how to reduce the sodium content of my cats’ food so I tried buying chicken necks and boiled them for the cats. The two critters just sniffed at it and trotted off. They like fried fish though. Our Manila reporter’s dog had surgery last week because of kidney stones. Some vet friends said some pet foods have high sodium content so sometimes it helps if we vary the food of our pets.


Ms Butingting strikes again.

I thought the bluetooth hardware of this old gaming laptop was a goner. I searched for solutions on the interwebs and experimented with some software updates…in the process I lost connection for my dual screen monitors…IN THE END IT PAID OFF. I have my Bluetooth connection back. And the monitors back as well. I was afraid I would have to open the laptop and search if there was a physical disconnection somewhere. 😰 Whew! I was able to solve it. No need to rush having a new desktop computer assembled when we have semiconductor supply issues now.


While I was driving to and from Tiendesitas this afternoon and evening, I was thinking that I really don’t have to enroll/take reviews to get a CIIA if I’m not too keen on shifting industries. I would just make myself miserable just because I want to be busy to recover from a heartbreak. I could just enroll in art classes and go back to photography to distract myself. My colleague-friend said she took CFA exams because she figured she can’t be a journalist forever if she wants to stay in Singapore and not go back home to HK (because there’s really nothing to go back home to there now) and it was a good way to be productive to recover from Jaded.

Meanwhile, I could just become a communications consultant while immersing myself again in the academe—if needed—since I know this industry like the back of my hand. I already have some kind of expertise in it now and at this age, I cannot be a half-baked something. Like a Jill-of-all-trades, master of nothing.

My older sister just had a short course with a known local visual artist and there you go—she was able to mount an exhibit in 2018. She didn’t change careers (she’s still an economist with a PhD in a related niche industry) but going into visual arts provided her some kind of extension of her personality. I could just do that.

I could do pottery classes. I liked Ugu Bigyan’s ceramics when I first visited his place in 2000. I think it’s one art form that could reduce me to tears if I try to learn it.

I’ll just dabble in different art forms to keep me busy. I’ll just try to be Rajiv Surendra and try my hand at everything that looks interesting. Then build an art studio/workshop at my backyard when we finally settle into my hometown.

Yeah, I don’t have to take CIIA just because it sounds cool. I didn’t care for titles anyway.