Category Archives: on the job

Hard landing or soft landing?

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We don’t know how long the elevated prices and supply squeeze will last. The oil prices at gas stations keep rising and jeepney drivers are throwing in their towels and are now looking for alternative sources of livelihood. They simply can’t make ends meet. Not with this daily price hikes and horrible traffic.

And yet this stupid government is still saying the PHP 20-per-kilo-rice is doable, at the expense of poor Filipino farmers

But Federation of Free Farmers Cooperatives national manager Raul Montemayor said the DAR’s plan would only make farmers end up losing more, especially if the farm-gate price — or the selling price between a trader and a farmer — is further reduced.

Montemayor said if a kilo of rice would be sold at P20, the farm-gate price would have to be about P10 a kilo.

As a rule of thumb, the retail price of rice is at least double the farm-gate price of palay (unhusked rice), which is currently P19 a kilo.

Philippine Daily Inquirer

Meanwhile, the outgoing cabinet secretaries of Duterte admin say it simply cannot be done.

These idiots are not even coordinating their press releases 🙄

If these asshats have any iota of intelligence, then the first thing they should fix is the supply chain problems/inefficiencies/bottlenecks, which eat up 40-50% of the cost of goods, especially food, in this country. That alone has an immediate effect on the prices of food, which comprise bulk of the CPI.

I spent the day talking to this investment company that primarily provides mezzanine financing to SMEs. It slightly lifted me out of the doldrums but I’m still having a tough battle with the promotion of my people. Like what the heck?! Why is it even hard to have my good reporters promoted and have their pay raised? What the fuck is this company??? It was like defending my thesis all over again.

I was so angry this afternoon that I refused to work overtime.

I had put my ass on the line by saying that if they don’t give these people their due, they will leave the company—and one of them was already being pirated in front of me by a rival company (which was 100% true). If that happens, my work will be unbearable because I will be plugging the gap by myself and that would force me to look for opportunities elsewhere because I simply cannot overwork myself for little pay, I said.

Now I have to look for Plan B.

Being under this new parent company is much worse than being owned by a PE that squeezes the life out of a business. 🤬

Today just sucked the life out of me. I was feeling sorry for myself since last night until today and this HR issue added to the pain I’m having today.

Oppo Band. To motivate me to move. Photo by CallMeCreation.com

I’m sooooo looking forward to my break next week. I will shake off the bad jujus and tune out. I will love myself and make myself believe that I am not as horrible and unlovable as my ex-partner thinks I am.

I hit bumps like this from time to time because I’m still working through my trauma. It’s part of the process.

Anyway, I took advantage of the sale last Saturday in Glorietta and bought this smart watch that I will test this coming Saturday in Pico de Loro when I dive/swim laps.

Meanwhile, the cats managed to bring a smile to my face last night despite feeling like shit.

Sushi inside the paper bag
Kimchi’s turn to destroy the paper bag
Have paperbag, have cat. Photo by CallMeCreation.com

Chonky cat. 😻

Manic Monday

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Starting the Monday with a full to-do list. Photo by CallMeCreation.com

When I dedicate one entire screen for my music, I mean business.

I didn’t even stop for breaks today. I had my weekly call with the team, then non-stop editing and I still had to write my own story that I must publish by hook or by crook tomorrow. Or else I would be taken over by events.

Then my requests for interviews have been trickling back to me and I have to schedule my interviews away from my week-long break. My brain was so exhausted today that I fell asleep at around 6:30 pm trying to book a Zennya massage. And that of course didn’t go well.

Sushi, sleeping ON my clothes while I slept beside her.

I woke up with Sushi beside me on my bed. She just loves my stuff and my smell. They feel comforted that I’m just around. Although they aren’t the lovey-dovey cats that I see on social media, I know my cats love me especially when they meow like crazy to be let in my room or when I arrive home from somewhere. It’s like they’re scolding me, “Where have you been?!”

I’m still here at my table trying to write my to-do list tomorrow since I know I will be editing multiple stories again and I must respond to emails that have long been forgotten in my mailbox. My Gmail has 8,000 unread emails and who knows when I will be able to clear that. My Outlook has 1,329 unread emails that I need to clear soon, too. My Yahoo has like 10,000+ emails that I think I will never be able to clear. Those are mostly press releases and newsletter subscriptions from way back.

I need to sort through my receipts because some of those carry warranties. I don’t know how they fitted in my wallet but they did. 🤔

Meanwhile in our daily news…

Like what the hell? Erwin Tulfo does not have any…🙄 Never mind. I’m done. Just done. I’m skipping most of the news these days and I haven’t checked FB much because the level of toxicity is beyond what I can endure daily.

I need to bike tomorrow to let off steam. Even if it rains.

Gone were the days

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Media scrum after former Vice President Jojo Binay‘s speech in a business conference. Photo by Philippine Star.

Gone were the days that we could interview officials this freely. Doorstop/ambush interviews like this are golden because the interviewees’ responses to questions are often not scripted and this is where we get the soundbites. I used my iPod Touch for voice recordings because it was easier to use when I’m transcribing. This photo was taken in 2014, when then-VP Binay was dealing with allegations of corruption and such. I couldn’t hide my resting bitch face because I wasn’t really happy with what I was hearing. I could not help but reminisce and feel nostalgic about how our lives as reporters were relatively easier back then. 😭

I saw this photo when I was uploading new photos on my Google Drive that I share with my cousins.

We had lunch in my bff cousin’s house since her sister from New Jersey arrived for a vacation and to visit their mom who almost died last year (or technically she already died because her heart stopped twice???). So I took photos with my trusty Fujifilm XQ1 (which I don’t think will die anytime soon) because for me it was easier to snap photos quickly with a standalone pocketable digicam. My mom and older sister came, too, so they can see my aunt for the first time after she was hospitalized in our hometown at the height of the Covid-19 Delta lockdown (she had a stroke and no Metro Manila hospital could take her in).

As I went through my Google Drive and Photos, I saw some pictures that I haven’t seen for a long time, like this one:

I was just 18 here.

I was with my cousin (whose house we invaded today) and my younger sister (yes, she looks older than me). My girls look like me.

Gone were the days I could fit into a size 6 😭

I’m still staring at the sketches I’ve done the past few days and I’m still trying to find the “spark” that would inspire me to paint. When I painted the pink peony yesterday when I’m not really into it, I wasn’t happy with the result. It’s hard when you force it.

I’ll probably just have to sleep this off.

Delaying tactics

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A magenta peony. Art and photo by CallMeCreation.com

I’ve been pushing back finishing that Sombrero island painting. I’m having a problem with how sunlight strikes violent waves. I am almost getting it with the waves near the boat but the farther the waves are from the boat/from my perspective, the more trouble I have with sunlight reflection/refraction.

You see, painting is like solving a problem; you always get troubled by how light falls on the subject and the perspective—how the lines meet, especially in urban sketching. Rooftops are difficult, especially if the structures have different angles. That’s why painting/drawing is a good way to keep myself occupied because I don’t have to think about things that are troubling me.

Art and photo by CallMeCreation.com

I made a mistake here. I should have left the pencil outline and shouldn’t have used the UniPin liner for the finishing touches.

Art and photo by CallMeCreation.com

I’m a bit unhappy with how this turned out. I’ll try to see if this will grow on me.

Art and photo by CallMeCreation.com

Ok this is better.

Art and photo by CallMeCreation.com

While I wait if the above watercolor painting will be something that I will like later on, I made a sketch of nemophilas or “baby blue eyes”. This is how I saw them/photographed them in May 2017 in Hitachi Kaihin Koen in Ibaraki Prefecture (see photo I used for this blog’s header). I used the darkest pencil I have in my arsenal and would see if I can leave it as is without layering it with a UniPin liner.

Today was a bit rough at work as I was editing non-stop. That problem journo from India was displaying her attitude problem so I had to shoot her down in our email thread. Her ex-officemate in Mumbai (he already left the company) and I were chatting this morning and he told me this journo, R, is exuding “India newsroom vibes” where everyone thinks he/she is the star reporter so they all display similar arrogance. He said, R does not fit in my company because of her attitude problem; our company, M, is not like the usual Indian newsroom. When I showed him how she replies to my emails, he said: Oh wow, how can you have the guts to speak to an editor like that?

“She thinks she’s a goddess. Her BC does not like her and she doesn’t like her BC,” he said. That’s how I ended up editing her. The problem is she doesn’t like to be edited. Her BC keeps rejecting her copies because they are not up to par—still India newsroom-y, this ex-colleague said. So her draft with me reached a fifth iteration and yet she demanded that this should be published right away. I told her firmly that the publication of this article will depend on how polished this is. “As I told you, editing analysis pieces do not take just a day,” I scolded her.

I told my ex-colleague, “And you know how thorough I am with my edits.” Yup, he agreed because I was the one who trained him.

I told my manager in Seoul about this problem journo and she was backing me up in that email thread.

Shooting down biaaaaatches is really tiring. On a Friday. 😣

Meanwhile, my manager finally approved my leave and two weeks from now I will be toasting under the sun. First I will be Pico de Loro then I will be with my bffs in Caliraya. Either we will get the glamping tents or the boathouse. I have yet to book the accommodations. Will have to talk to them tomorrow regarding the schedule.

The past few days I was feeling like shit because of the bad news left and right. I suddenly wanted to have someone hug me and assure me that everything will be all right. I wanted somehow to have a safe place and feel protected when I sleep. That’s all I wanted; I’m a simple person. I never demanded anything else.

But then you know it seems like such things are not for me. Maybe I was made to be this way—independent and strong-willed—because in the end I will always be alone. So I need to toughen up more, especially during the times I feel weak and vulnerable.

No, I shouldn’t let myself be a wilting flower like that because that leads to mistakes. Major mistakes. I just have to be kinder to myself and learn to hug myself to sleep. I don’t want to get hurt like that again. I’ve come soooooooo far from where I’ve been 1.5 years ago.

It’s kinda shitty that it is taking me a long time to completely recover while nobody gives a flying fuck about me. Not him anyway.

Awwww jeez. I must be very tired to be holding a pity party like this on a Friday night.

I just need to rest. Tomorrow will be better.

Now it has begun

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The demonization of media and the legitimization of disinformation peddlers like Think*ng P*noy and M*rk L*pez has started. The more that we will get harassed, the more that we will be suppressed by this government. This red-tagger is now more empowered to call us communists that will automatically put us in the shoot-to-kill order of the military and the police.

How can you even feel safe in this kind of environment? In the US, the level of harassment of newsmen is not as dire as in the Philippines, where journalist killings are as rampant as in war zones in other countries.

He is now threatening the media owners that, hey, ABS-CBN will not be an isolated case anymore.

The incoming Sec Gen of the National Economic and Development Authority is a nice guy and I often had bets with him about the outcome of GDP numbers every quarter when I used to cover the macroeconomy. However, this does not negate the fact that he used to work with Marcos Jr when the latter was the governor of Ilocos Norte and I doubt his capacity to say no to shenanigans as he is more if a “yes” man more often than not.

This is the reason why my brother is/was invited to be an undersecretary under this administration. This guy and my brother have almost the same specialization and they had worked together on my brother’s doctoral dissertation. My older sister and I already expressed our disgust if he accepts the offer.

My mom was offered a director position to head a unit at the Department of Science and Technology. But the papers would have to be signed by Jr so my mom declined and said she’s already deaf but in truth she cannot stomach working under Marcos. She said two candidates for National Scientist declined the award because Jr has to present them the award. That’s how reviled he is.

Meanwhile, I got so frustrated this morning because I got disturbed by a journo in India last night. She was the one asking me for favors and yet she’s the one who appears to be more demanding than my own reporters. 🙄 She thinks that editing analysis articles is a piece of cake.

Learning to say no.

I had a journo messaging me at 8 pm asking to discuss her analysis piece. I said no, we will discuss tomorrow since I have children to attend to now.

A content editor was asking many simple questions about a story I edited, I asked, can you address your concerns to the journalist who wrote this? It is 11 pm and I am already in bed.

I have started turning off my Microsoft Teams because they always mistake I am available 24/7. Is there a way that makes Teams put you on an “away” mode automatically at a certain time? I have no problems with emails because I can ignore them. But instant messaging is really intrusive.

my FB post

And I spent most of my day today dealing with that story.

Boundaries. We need boundaries. I hate co-workers nagging me during off-hours for work-related matters. I’m no machine! All bosses should also know how to stop this bad habit like their staff is working 24/7. Ghad, we’re not slaves!

STRESS RELIEF

#catloaf. Photo by CallMeCreation.com

This is not a perfect cat loaf as Sushi’s front paw is showing. I can’t resist squishing them when they’re in a complete cat loaf position. I don’t know why. They evoke squishy stuffed toys of my youth?

Photo from comfortzone.com

My cats had been my stress absorber since my erst-while babies are all grown up, so by substitution my cats are now my babies.

Ain’t this the truth?!

Another stress-buster for me is scrolling through IG, looking at drawings, figuring out how I can do a similar thing. I learn by looking at their step-by-step posts.

I also browse through Amazon before sleeping and check out prices of Daniel Smith and Rembrandt watercolors and Lazada for Holbein sets. As if the prices would change 🙄 These friggin’ brands are sooooo expensive and yet…I want them. I know the joy of jumping from student grade to almost-artist-grade and they’re miles apart. What more if I get to use artist-grade colors? 🥰 I couldn’t bring myself to buy Rembrandt because that thing costs USD 180!

Maybe when I’m good enough to exhibit, I will brave it and spend PHP 9,000+ for a tin of watercolors. 😶

I will buy this as a gift to myself. I’ve reached my quota of gifts to myself (new piano, computer keyboard), maybe I will do this in December???

Or or or…maybe when I go to Japan I will buy myself a huge set of Holbein watercolors and all the pens I could cart away in my bag.

In the meantime, let me browse through e-commerce sites for these babies until I fall asleep. 😂

I’m so sleepy

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Body clock still out of whack. I slept before 12 last night then I got woken up at 4 am. Had to fall back asleep. Then woke up at 9 am! Despite that, I still fell asleep at 1 pm and woke up after 1.5 hrs.

What’s wrong with me???😢

Anyway, got my groove back and tackled this Sombrero Island watercolor. I’m waiting for it to dry then do another layer.

Art and photo by CallMeCreation.com

I’m missing the sea again. I wish I could go now but the weather is uncooperative. I want to try checking in at Arthur’s Place or Planet Dive.

It’s quite annoying that my trip to Singapore this June is yet to be approved. Needed to justify why I need to attend such and such conference, do we often attend such, etc. Like hello! That’s my freaking job!!!

I hate our HQ head.

They’re giving me lots of headaches.

Good thing my cats provide me some stress relief.

Sushi. Photo by CallMeCreation.com

I hope tomorrow will be better.