Meanwhile, my APAC boss said HQ is working out an arrangement that I don’t have to be in Singapore to take on my new role next year. Hopefully, it would push through. If they can’t give me the salary I want (it should be above SGD 14k because that’s the minimum with primary school children) and not just the minimum requirement that the Singapore government demands, then it’s a no-go.
If only sending kids to school there is not that expensive. 🤷🏻♀️
Why the trauma?
Because when you loved someone so much, more than anybody in your life like that, and you get that kind of treatment, it’s traumatizing.
Yes, I’ve never loved anyone like that in my life. In the past I’ve had the courage to walk away. Not this time.
I don’t think I’ll ever love like that again. I no longer have any love to give.
So I just pray that the next person will love him more than I did because he rejected mine since it was not enough.
And as for me, I pray that I will get my peace. That’s all I ask for. Peace.
My friends and I were computing how much I should demand if they force me to transfer to Singapore.
Based on this self-assessment test by the Ministry of Manpower, the minimum salary of someone with my position and profile should get at least SGD 10,000++ or around USD 7,400. That’s the minimum and does not guarantee that I would get an e-Pass. A rival company had advertised for SGD 13,000 (USD 9,000) so they would have to justify why I would only get SGD 10k and not SGD 13k.
Given that the parent company is cheap, they wouldn’t give me the SGD 13k while the SGD 10k is too tight a budget given that HDBs in SG for 2-bed (it has to be 2 bed or otherwise the apartment would be too small) is SGD 2,600 in the outskirts like Jurong West. The school around that area is OWIS, which is around SGD 20k a year but the reviews are terrible given that it’s a budget international/private school. Ok, let’s just ignore the reviews for a second there. My housing would be SGD 2,600 + SGD 400 (utilities) + SGD 400 groceries + SGD 4,000 (school fees and other expenses) = SGD 7,400. It would be SGD 2,600 for everything else–that’s SGD 10k net. So that means I need to add 15% for tax and whatever contribution to pension or whatever the government subtracts.
I don’t think this would be a happy arrangement.
I think I would win the argument and they would let me just stay here.
I had back-to-back-to-back conferences and calls today and it will be like this for the rest of the week. The most hectic will be on Thursday when I will have 4 press conferences on top of big regional conferences. I wonder how I will stretch myself.
I have two interviews tomorrow and three regional conferences. I’m tempted to add another screen to my dual monitor setup. Hmm… Maybe I could use the laptop’s screen as a third screen. Crazy week.
We already made peace. Photo by CallMeCreation.com
Kimchi has somehow forgiven me and has started hanging out with me again. But I still need to continue giving her the antibiotic and antacid. The vomiting has stopped ofter 24 hrs of giving her the oral meds last week.
Florals. Photo by CallMeCreation.com
I still sew masks to help me relax at night while watching YouTube videos of crafting, interior design, or whatever creative things that help me calm down. I’m going to give this batch to my cousin who just arrived from Ireland. It’s her birthday today. I think she still has my drunken video about Chris Hemsworth from 2018 when she and another cousin came to my old house to celebrate my singlehood. The next day I was so hungover while packing my bags and was almost late for my flight to Singapore.
Prior to this, I gave the last batch of masks as an appreciation gift to one of my friends from the industry who sent groceries when I was half-dead with Covid. They posted my gifts on Facebook; it seemed like they were really happy with them.
Next projects would be curtains again but with crochet laces at the hem. All handmade by me. Good luck to me.
Morning sunlight filtered through my muslin curtains that I made. Photo by CallMeCreation.com
I thought I would be having a more relaxed day today so I savored the morning sunlight while in bed. I thought I would take it easy.
Then my cat vomited again. This is the third time it happened. The two times it happened last week were in the mornings and every time Kimchi vomited, she went back to her food bowl and ate again her kibbles like nothing happened. So I thought it was just a case of hairball. But when the girls told me this morning Kimchi vomited twice, I decided this is no longer a hairball case.
Long story short, I spent like 2 hours in the vet clinic. It turns out she has an infection after her CBC came back. I came out of the clinic with a shopping bag full of meds and supplements. I was PHP 4,500 poorer with a very grumpy cat because she was poked three times (CBC, antibiotic, and antacid).
A very grumpy Kimichi. Photo by CallMeCreation.com
Another cause of stress is this: While I was at the vet clinic, a colleague under my watch messaged me he is resigning. Then I called him. That was a bummer because he is productive and resourceful and I was the one who brought him into the company. The biggest push why he is leaving is because of mismanagement–which I had been struggling with for several months now, too. Actually the issue has been festering for a long time now but I just grinned and borne it for years. That issue has been causing me so much stress and probably that’s another reason why I no longer have the motivation to write. I had already warned our APAC head about this months prior and told her people are really unhappy and I’m doing my damned best to keep the team intact while I battle some kind of power struggle because as I step up to help my teammates, I get hammered from above. I am already at the edge and there is little that’s holding me in place now unless they do something to improve the situation.
So I told my junior co-worker that if he talks to the APAC head tomorrow, “please do us a favor; you should tell her everything that is wrong and that I would soon be following you if things don’t turn around.” I’m just holding on because I like the flexibility that I have right now as I can work at my own pace and I can work from anywhere. However, they have let this really bad situation go on and on and on and on for a long time now and I was the one holding up the ceiling. I’m tired. And if I leave, everyone will leave as well as I was the only one keeping the team from falling apart.
The issue has been causing me so much stress and I was just sweeping this under the rug for months because I can handle only one issue at a time. I had to recover first from my heartache then I would tackle the work problem, I thought. However the two had been overlapping, causing me so much anxiety and stress. My back and neck muscles are stiff as hell and I’ve had trouble sleeping for several nights now because of my stiff neck. I booked a massage tonight and that somehow that eased the physical pain.
