Yes, Johnny Depp, you’re right. Sometimes the dam breaks because it couldn’t hold on much longer. The cracks are just too great. We cry because our dams break. And it’s ok.

But I’m in a good place now. Last month was bad but I was holding it as far as I could. I’m enjoying whatever momentary peace I have now.

Today is just unbearably hot. I water my plants everyday but the heat is just too much. To think that I’m already surrounded by my trees, the temperature is still unbearble. I am so thankful we’re no longer in Metro Manila because my electric bill would probably be 10k by now and my aircon working doubly hard to keep us cool 24/7.

I could only come out of my house at 4 pm to feed and give water to the cats outside and water the plants. It’s just too hot to do anything.

By 5 pm I come out of the balcony and try to catch some sun and watch birds roost.

I enjoy moments like this.

I am, however, contemplating whether I can forfeit this simple joy for another job because my next job may be more hectic than this. A friend from a rival newswire messaged me on Viber that they are looking for a Manila-based global editor. She doesn’t have the details but it’s more or less general news and business and it’s Asia/EMEA hours. She gave me the email address of the person hiring.

I will reach out to him tonight.

I am still weighing but this could be the reason why the PR writing thing is not yet working out. The universe is conspiring for me to do this journalism thing. Deep down I’m still a news hound through and through.

Last week I approached one of my sources and I made a business proposal since he has been consulting me for PR stuff anyway. He said he couldn’t have a contract approved by his firm because I’m still attached to my current company. Well, this makes sense because they’re global and it’s hard to have something under the table, even just as an initial engagement. I said yeah, let’s have something formal once I get out of my current job.

But it’s chicken and egg situation; I can’t get out if I couldn’t get enough clients to sustain me and right now I have zero.

Let’s see how this goes.

Meanwhile, this same friend sent me photos of their shooting-the-rapids getaway this weekend.

The river and the falls are just 30 mins away from my house. She said it was just a spontaneous thing they did—they just hired a boat and boat men and went riding the rapids and spent the night in Caliraya.

I am itching to go somewhere. We may do it this Labor Day.