This is what I imagine what it feels like to be on top of Mt. Pulag, which is now closed to the public due to the recent forest fires caused by irresponsible hikers/campers.

Again, violent colors.

I broke down today.

I operated on barely 3 hrs of sleep last night/today. I was being berated by my manager last night until 10 pm for some articles I edited last week. As the reporter concerned said, it was a matter of differences in the appreciation of the subject matter that’s why my boss kept on pushing her way other than how I understood the story and situation because I am the one entrenched in the market, not my boss.

I finished some edits at 5:30 am today. Then tried to catch some sleep. I couldn’t function, like I couldn’t write or send emails to ask for interviews.

When I was watching a video of The Corrs concert last year and everyone was singing “Runaway”, I just couldn’t help it but I just cried. I don’t know why. Maybe I lacked sleep. Maybe I just needed to release this anxiety and grief.

I am tired. I give up.

I don’t know how long I will be like this.