My world has gotten smaller and smaller. I barely get out of 5km radius of my home. I only get to see a glimpse of the outside world when I ride my bike, like yesterday. Just to get a glimpse of the sunset. To get out of my head.

January was too long for me. I guess February is the same. I’m a prisoner of this pandemic. I’m a prisoner of my mind as well. I want to escape. I want to be very far away from here.

The one thing to look forward to in my excursions is this 16 oz fruit shake. My world has been reduced to that.

Next week I want to go on a social media hiatus because everything will have Valentine’s Day ads. Not that I really celebrate it but this time it’s really painful. Two years ago we were in Hong Kong and on V-day we hiked to Victoria Peak to see the sunset. We took the ferry on the way to Kowloon and it was cold. He was so sweet at that time. Had dinner in some hole-in-the-wall restaurant there in Kowloon and took the last train ride back to Sai Ying Pun.

I’m a prisoner of my mind. I want to get away from here. I want to erase the memories.

My little girl told me, “Mommy, we will be your date on V-day.” Yes, my darling daughters. My heart may have been ripped out of me but you are there to help fill the void. I may even grow a new heart because of you, my angels.