I just got back from driving Twin I to school. Yes, at 3:30 am. They are going to a provincial competition for science and technology writing. A sort of journalism competition and call time is very early. They needed to be at the venue at daybreak for some prep work. I packed my daughter a bento box for lunch and made a hamburger sandwich for another meal if needed—at 2:30 in the morning. 🥴

I’ve driven the same road at the same time at 3 am 24 years ago, on the way home from a gig from another city. I was 20 years old; I was still on the way home at this hour. Of course I was often inebriated and it proves that God was always guiding me as I haven’t figured in a driving accident even if the alcohol level in my blood was questionable. I was like this every night or every time we had gigs. Now that I’m 24 years older, I just realized that I was just one wrong turn away from being another fatal driving accident statistic, especially in the zigzag highway my bandmates and I braved in those days.

How times have changed. I never thought that 25 years after, I—a rocker party girl—will be driving the same road to bring my daughter to school so she can be in an inter-school competition for journalism. I never would have imagined that I will have a daughter that would be chosen by her school for something that I would have wanted for myself when I was her age.

I told her to just enjoy the experience and winning is not the goal—it is a bonus. The joy of being with other people with the same talent as you have and meeting new friends from other schools is more precious. I had competed in science fairs when I was 15-16, which allowed me to fly to Cebu and be given a special award by the Dept of Science and Technology. I met a life-long Cebu-based friend there and funny how things turned out—neither of us pursued a career in science. He became a lawyer while I became a journalist.

The special award was cherry on top; the real reward was meeting other people from Manila Science (MaSci), Philippine Science (Pisay), Pamantasan ng Lungsod ng Maynila, and UP Diliman. Even though we were competitors, we became friends and we had hung out in the hotel pool and basically messed up the pool because we dipped there just wearing our shirts and shorts. We hired a taxi to bring us to a spot that overlooked Cebu City at night, like their version of Padi’s Point or Cloud 9 in Antipolo. We laughed our asses off, we made a lot of noise—we were basically being kids.

I told my daughter that awards are just that, awards. They’re just a trophy or plaque. But the experience of being there with like-minded people is priceless and you will carry it with you forever.

If only I could watch this… Benedict Cumberbatch looks amazing in this. He and Jonny Lee Miller switch roles as Frankenstein and the creature. Good theater performances fill my soul.

When was the last time I watched something on stage? It has been a long time since. Rak of Aegis was the  last local one I watched and Hamilton was the latest one. I wasn’t able to catch PETA’s latets production, One More Chance, because I was so deep into my troubles with work.

I need to chill. See a play or a musical.

Well, I braved the public with my pockmarked face. I didn’t have any choice since I had a dentist appointment and I needed to pick up my gold necklace for repair.

Good news is that my dentist said there was no need to excise my impacted molar and the pain was coming from the inflamed soft tissue beneath the second molar. He said it was because the said molar was bearing the burden of all the chewing as my left upper molars are out of action for now. He already cleansed my right second molar so inflamation should die down albeit slowly because of my elevated blood sugar. So this morning we prepped my upper left molars for the bridges. My birthday gift to myself—they’re expensive.

But the veneers that I would be preparing for are more expensive. They’re going to cost me pretty money… Enough for a downpayment for an SUV. 🫠 Upon seeing my xray, my dentist said braces would not correct my lower incisors because the canine incisors are already fixed (root canal) and the tendency of the front incisors is to go back to their current positions. In short, my teeth are non-adjustable. 😩 Then veneers it is.

I initially planned to go to a spa and hot spring resort but I don’t think the management of those establishments would believe me that my pockmarks are cauterized warts. They might think I have monkeypox. So I will stay home in the meantime until the scabs have disappeared.

Maybe I should shift to showbusiness reporting. Maybe I could get an Andrew Garfield of my own and not just Garfield the Cat. These two make me feel kilig. 🥰

Wohoooo! I don’t have to deal with bullshit right now. Last night I spent 3 hrs finishing that IT compliance training so IT would stop emailing my boss that I haven’t completed the training yet.

I spent the entire morning doomscrolling. I know, I know, that’s the dumbest way the spend my free time but my brain just wants to be dead for a few hours after spending my Monday and Tuesday chasing people on my phone and via my pc. Aside from spending 3 hrs on compliance training last night, I also had to deal with an editor outside of east Asia who doesn’t know about estate planning by family corportations that involves IPO and its tax implications. At 8 pm when I’m supposed to be off. 🤦🏻‍♀️

So I can be forgiven for wanting to be brain dead this morning. Now I need to walk to my old dentist to have a crown that has gotten loose reattached and deal with my painful impacted wisdom tooth.

I got a new dentist and he’s good. (My old dentist has doesn’t have clinic in the afternoons and on Thursdays). He explained things to me really well and he didn’t go straight into drilling holes into my tooth and whatnot. He did some scaling first and checked my second molar next to my impacted third molar to initially investigate why it was hurting.

His other clinic with dental Xray that can do panoramic scans is quite far from where we were so he referred to me to another nearby clinic for that said Xray. Within minutes, the Xray was emailed to my new dentist. I’m going to have my second molar opened if there is an abscess or he could go straight to excision of my impacted wisdom tooth tomorrow morning.

I have too much dental work needed but I had delayed it in favor of my mental health recovery. I also became busy with building my house and then with Twin A’s health. My dental work took a back seat. Now I’m paying the price. The odontectomy that was supposed to be done during the pandemic has now become an emergency procedure. Then there’s the matter of the loose crown that will now become a bridge. Or rather four bridges will be made. I didn’t have an implant made before because I needed to deal with the impacted molars first. I had been too busy in  the last six years to bother with it. When all that is done, I will have my lower teeth braced to address the gaps. Or veneers can be made. I have to weigh the pros and cons with my dentist.

My sister-in-law referred me to him today and immediately called his clinic. He is a Filipino-Canadian dual citizen and decided to come home to open clinics here in our hometown. He has a lot of foreign and balikbayan clients, who sustain his practice and allow him to offer affordable services to those who need it.

After my dentist visit, I went back to the derma clinic to have my warts cauterized.

I have had my facial warts cauterized before but I again neglected this regular skin maintenance because I had been so preoccupied with other things and people in the past six years. By the time that I had started to take care of myself, my facial warts had already multiplied and reached my neck and chest area. I have skin tags as well, which is thought to be genetic and associated with polycystic ovary syndrome 🙋. Also might be caused by elevated sugar and insulin resistance 🙋

I now have a stinging sensation on my neck and chest area. I look like a plucked chicken with hives. It will take 7 days before my skin returns to normal. This is the reason why I timed this visit to the derma during my week-long personal time off. I don’t have to face the public while I have temporary pock marks.

My friend, who’s a lawyer in Singapore, messaged me yesterday as she contemplated about going back here in our hometown. She was the one who was hell-bent on getting PR status in Singapore. Now she’s changing her tune.

She said she’s tired. She wants peace in her soul. She feels hopeless about her status, divorced in Singapore but not recognized in the Philippines. She dragged herself into dating hell. Now she wants to retreat to our hometown.

I warned her that she will be shocked because her fast-paced life in Singapore as a lawyer for a global firm is very much different from the slow and quiet life we’re leading here. She might get frustrated since our hometown is for people who are settled and are no longer looking for a love life or excitement. Those who have come back home are those who are looking for peace and quiet, those who want to have a tranquil life.

She is still hoping to get a partner even after her failed marriage and series of broken relationships in quick succession. She admits she couldn’t live alone.

I told her to stay in Singapore for a bit and just come back here when she’s firm with her retirement plans. Because she might get shell-shocked with how boring it is here. I said I drive to Metro Manila at least once a week to give a little complication to my life, to annoy myself with carmageddon, and for some retail therapy. After subjecting myself to the toxicity of the city, I come back home with renewed appreciation for the provincial life. Then the cycle goes on.

Twin I told me that what she missed in my absence the entire week last week was my cooking. She said she missed the variety. While I was away, my daughters ate next door. Twin I said that they ate dishes on repeat in my mom’s house. I told her it’s because they don’t cook or don’t know how to cook so they’re dependent on what was prepared by my mom’s cook every Saturday and Wednesday.

She asked for Spam musubi today so Spam musubi it is.

For dinner, I made tuna mayo rice roll that Twin A loved, with fern salad and homemade Asian sesame dressing.

All morning I was watching Chinese cooking on XiaoHongShu so I was thinking of replicating some of the easier dishes. I think I need a bigger claypot or a Dutch oven (Staub or Le Creuset) for some of the cooking that I just watched.

My other cousin (I have so many cousins right now) showed me this morning the areas where we used to hike with our cousins and friends. When we had more stamina than sense, we would climb the mountain that our town is known for, or hike down to go to Taal Lake.

So there was this pathway that led us down to the foot of the ridge and terminated at a cold spring water pool. A few meters is the edge of the Lake. It was a perfect spot for us restless teenagers to swim, rinse ourselves, and have a picnic. It was a time when Taal Lake was not polluted.

This forested pathway has now become a garden resort. We no longer have access to the spring water pool since this area has been in private hands.

We then drove to another spot where my uncles watched the big Taal Volcano eruption right before the Covid 19 lockdown started. One uncle is a professor of geology at UC San Diego, who was the dissertation advisor of our current Dept of Science and Technology secretary. The other uncle was a metallurgist/materials engineer who initially was a geologist when he first enrolled in UP. They were like little kids giddy with excitement as they watched the fireworks. That was a fond memory for those who were there because one of those uncles passed—he died of Covid during the early days of the lockdown.

Not far from this place is my dad’s property that was handed down to him by my grandma. It has almost the same views of the lake. When he retired early from the university, he didn’t know what to do with himself so he tried to do some silviculture system there.

One time my older sister and I drove our pickup truck to that mountain hideaway and picked up our father. He said he wanted to build a resthouse there. Of course that was fanciful thinking as we knew there was no money for such and he was already sick.

Now I’m inspired to do the same after I saw what other people had done to their properties with their own private views of the lake and the volcano that could rival Tagaytay. I have no money but I can work on the land title. I mean my dad died without any of us fixing the estate. We might get victimized by landgrabbers since there are resorts sprouting like mushrooms in our town.

And just like that, it’s as if the universe is conspiring… My architect uncle—my dad’s younger brother—went to the wake this morning and he just happened to drop by because he was in town. He told me he was fixing the right of way to one of the family’s properties, a farmland at the foot of that same mountain. That farm was an orchard when another uncle, a horticulturist—more specifically, a pomologist—had grown mangoes there. I remember carting baskets upon baskets of ripe mangoes at the back of our pickup truck. One basket contained 25kg of ripe mangoes. And I drove that freaking truck fully loaded with mangoes to our university.

The problem at that time was, ok, you’re an academic putting into practice your expertise. However, you are a bad businessman. You can grow tons of mangoes but you don’t have a ready market for it. 🤦🏻‍♀️ My professor uncle poured so much money into that farm but he wasn’t making money from the produce. It was just like hobby farming.

Anyway, now that this younger uncle is starting to fix some estate matters, I think it’s about time my siblings should stop being lazy and we should start doing the same.

I didn’t realize how tired I was yesterday. Only when I read my blog entry yesterday, writing “diseased” instead of “deceased” did I realize I was already zombie-walking. I was almost brain-dead with exhaustion.

It was a long day today. We finally laid her to rest.