I attended a family function yesterday and learned about the plans for our ancestral home. My cousin built a 4-storey commercial building near the municipal hall and his parents will live on the 3F after transfering from our ancestral home. He said the old house and lot, which they painstakingly renovated and expanded, is too noisy now as it is next to the highway. Well, he has a point; it’s not an ideal place for senior citizens to live in anymore.

The sad part is that they plan to demolish the house and all the structures around it (including my grandpa’s beloved kitchen) to make it into a commercial establishment.

My bestie cousin told me if we only (other cousins) had money, we could buy that family property instead of erasing all the footprints of our ancestors.

It’s nostalgia vs capitalism. Can we live with just nostalgia? I don’t know. My gut tells me we should at least try to buy it from my cousins.

However, we aren’t going to live in it so what’s the point?

Meanwhile, the home of my grandparents on my father’s side is still untouched. No one is living there and it stands there as a museum of sorts for that side of the family. My uncle who built it already retired and is living in a commercial establishment a kilometer or two from that house. He said he didn’t want to live there alone and do all the renovations because it was too bothersome.

I asked if I could at least scrounge through the old stuff I could preserve, like my dad’s old stuff.

However, I don’t have the time to do that. 😶

My father would have thrown a fit at the state of the house now. I mean it’s alright but you know that it’s like a haunted house, hosting the ghosts of the past while having no future.

Again, can we live with just the memories and remain in its stillness?

It has been a rough week.

I think half of my problem with that editor from the land of bubblegum pop is miscommunication. English is not her strong suit so 1) the tone is very harsh maybe because her first language is harsh or not polite, 2) she thinks I’m stupid for always misunderstanding her 3) she is harsh by nature.

So many lines are crossed. My skin jumps when I see her in my emails and chats.

Anyway, I’m just buying time. I’m figuring a way out. If I don’t get the two jobs I applied for, then I will have to figure out how to get two consulting contracts.

It’s the weekend; I’m driving to Batangas tomorrow and then to Caliraya on Sunday. To drive the cobwebs away.

Went back to civilization today to interview (I got two!) and to schedule several prospects. I need to draft three stories tomorrow to meet minimum requirement while on edit duty. I don’t know what supernatural powers I must activate to survive that.

I submitted my application to two jobs last night. I got so frustrated with my editor from the land of bubblegum pop, who held up two of my stories and rejected one. My cortisol went through the roof yesterday.

I can’t go on like this.

I mean, I quit being a team leader because I thought that was the source of all my anxiety and depression.

Nope.

It’s her.

And if I get either one of those two jobs, I must hire a driver because it’s an office-bound role.

Goodbye. It has been a good 12 years.

But if I don’t get either one, then I must endure bit more. 😵‍💫

@iamshainamartin

Am I trippin?!?! Tell me this ain’t sus!!! Hawaii is literally a “melting pot” where people from all over the world come to visit and many never go back to where they came from. #sus #stopthebullshit #nooneissafe

♬ original sound – G7❌ShainaMartin❌74

Are you kidding me?! Hawaii is literally stolen land by the US. Then they are being terrorized by ICE — land that is populated by natives, Filipinos (mostly Ilocanos brought by the Americans to plantations), Japanese, and Latinos. The white people are the immigrants there, idiots!

The anger and terror that they feel are similar to how we felt during the Duterte years. The thing though is that American media is complicit while Philippine media pushed back against fascism. That’s why some colleagues won the Pulitzer Prize. I was also a victim of the Duterte machinery in 2019, all the harassment from trolls and being singled out by some cabinet members after I pushed back against them.

All the media reports and documentation we produced were used to help bring Duterte to The Hague. The diligent human rights lawyers and rights fighters worked nonstop to bring justice to the likes of Kian and countless others who were killed without mercy.

My MAGA uncle is flying here in July with his entire brood and he is asking for help in booking a house and van for rent. I don’t think I’m thrilled to meet up with them. He once declared Trump’s second term is like the second coming of Jesus as he will save America. 🤮

I just drove this afternoon to the dorm of my scholar to give him some groceries, medicines, an electric kettle, and a hand-me-down cellphone that no one uses at home.

I’m financially supporting a UP student by paying for his meals via a food program for indigent students and pocket money for fare/cellphone load/school requirements every month until he graduates.

His parents are street vendors and they really can’t spare him anything, maybe just PhP 400 a month on average. When they get swiped by the police or whatever when the LGU conducts street clearing operations, his parents don’t have anything to bring home.

He already developed ulcer because he couldn’t eat well (that’s why I bought him 14 days worth of proton pump inhibitors).

Yes, UP equalizes opportunities for rich and poor Filipinos but the odds are still stacked against the poor students, especially if they can’t eat. It’s hard to get scholarships because these require high grades. How can you get high grades when you don’t get to eat in a day?! These kids are reliant on private food programs and there aren’t many.

I told my scholar that I won’t ask for anything. As long as he graduates, even if it’s not on time, it’s good enough for me.

Twin A asked me, Mommy, why are you doing this? (Just genuine curiosity). I told her, “Anak, we are so blessed. We have more than enough for our needs so that we can be a blessing to others.” Keeping more than what we need and accumulating it is called hoarding. There’s so much inequality and hunger around us that it’s almost a crime to hoard resources to one’s self.

I’m teaching my children how to love other people as they love themselves.

I got the first dibs. 🤣

This is my 19th year attending this annual event at the central bank and, of course, I had to be there.

Aside from the stories I would get (that I desperately needed) from this event, I also wanted to see the art pieces that are in rotation and the Brutalist architecture of the PICC.

I can have these framed in a shadow box.

And as usual, I brought home the table decor 🤣

As usual, we journalists are the ones left behind. The catering service crew was already wrapping up, we were still hanging out by the tables, drinking wine and taking selfies. For almost 20 years… 🙌