They said it will take me a year to fix my gut. Reverse its current state.

So I haven’t had any tea or juice drinks since I got hospitalized last Sunday. I hope I can last with just plain water. I haven’t had any pork yet. I ran out of fresh veggies to cook. Rice once a day.

I need willpower.

Meanwhile, my former neighbor in QC and I had been chatting on Viber or FB Messenger even until today. She sent me photos of how the parking alley looks like now that they have cut down the mango tree.

Cutting down the mango tree made things cleaner, but I guess the temperature in the area, especially in my old bedroom, is now higher by two degrees. 🥵 Well, the new tenant at unit C has completely sealed off the apartment (including the laundry area) and installed a split-type AC for the living area and kitchen, my ex-neighbor told me. Good luck to their electric bill—that area is really hot.

The messy tenant in unit B finally left but half-destroyed the unit because they let their dogs pee and poo inside the apartment and didn’t pay the utilities on their last month. Very uncouth. Had the temerity to claim their deposit.

All units have new tenants or had been vacated (in the case of B).

Twin I said she misses the place.

I’m still searching in my heart if I do, too. I have so many conflicting emotions regarding that apartment. I hate it because of J. I miss it because it has been my sanctuary, especially my former bedroom since it has ample space for all I needed.

This is how the apartment looked like this time last year.

Now I’m feeling something weird in my chest. Is it a pang of nostalgia? Well, I think it is!

This is the first time this painting, which won bronze at the Universal Expo in Paris in 1889, is being viewed in public since it won the award 134 years ago. I was the lucky few who got to view it early.

It was a feat for an indio from Islas Filipinas—considered a barbarian race by the Europeans—to have won something on the world stage. We were looked down upon by the Europeans and yet we beat some of their masters during this expo. The Filipino illustrados in Europe like José Rizal were so proud that a compatriot brought the little archipelagic nation on the map.

It’s much smaller than the Spoliarium by Luna, which won gold at the Exposición Nacional de Bellas Artes in Madrid in 1884. It was the same contest where Felix Hidalgo won silver medal for his Las Virgenes Cristianas Expuestas al Populacho.

Luna didn’t intend to submit Hymen to this contest; he created this because he was so high and in love with his wife during their honeymoon. It was just in his private collection. You could see the gentleness in each female figure and you could almost feel the textures of the clothes, the marble floor, the coldness of the pillars. According to our guide, Luna created this from his imagination.

Braving the heavy traffic at SLEX and Skyway this morning was worth it because I got the chance to view this in a semi-private tour and I didn’t have to contend with a lot of people taking selfies.

Of course I had to buy the print and have it framed. I just don’t know where to put it in my house.

Then I got another Juan Luna. I think I will hang it in the bathroom.

And I couldn’t resist this Fernando Amorsolo. Twin A and I were fighting over this. She wanted to stick this to her wall while I want this in the bathroom.

According to my CT scan, I have fatty liver and pancreas. I have one simple renal cyst that didn’t alarm my attending physician but is a wakeup call for me.

I need a lifestyle change.

Since I no longer have a gall bladder, all the fats and oils go straight into my system. I also should stop drinking alcohol even just for social drinking.

I just allowed myself be overwhelmed by stress that I had let my exercise regimen slide into the abyss. Stress helped the accumulation of stomach acids, compounded by my consumption of copious amount of caffeine in the form of tea (hot and cold), and skipping meals.

So I landed in the hospital. Acute gastritis.

My vomiting on Monday last week should have been enough warning for me to take it easy and stay away from caffeine and oily food—and yet I still cooked egg fried rice with tapa 🤦🏻‍♀️

Let it be a lesson for me.

Don’t take my job too seriously. It’s not worth dying for.

I should take care of myself for the sake of my children. Just because I don’t have a partner doesn’t mean I shouldn’t be concerned about how I treat myself.

My stomach still aches maybe due to muscle spasms so I still have to make it more settled. I should keep my soft diet for a week so my system will not be shocked. My proton pump inhibitor is to be taken two weeks to reduce my stomach acids.

This is part of ageing 🤦🏻‍♀️ I’m no longer a sprightly 20-year-old who doesn’t need a long recovery period. How I have abused my body in my youth. 😕

So for tomorrow, I have hired my mom’s driver so I can attend that lunch meeting with one of the country’s top conglomerates. I don’t think I can drive yet.

It’s taking so long for them to discharge me because CT scan reading took a while. Radiologist is not here everyday. That’s the thing with hospitals in provinces, you gotta share radiologists because there aren’t enough of them here in the Philippines.

I remember writing an article about radiology and a technology that enables hospitals to transmit images like X-rays, CT scans, etc. to radiologists so they don’t have to be physically present in the hospital to read. That solves the problem of scarcity of healthcare workers, especially in the provinces. I could have been discharged yesterday but…🤷🏻‍♀️

Speaking of shortage of specialists, my older sister told me about her bestfriend’s hesitation about transfering Twin A to another hospital when she was under her care prior to the transfer to PGH. She said when she asked around about the reputation of the pediatric hemato-oncologist of that hospital recommended by Metro Pacific, people said, “OK lang” and not the enthusiastic “she’s good.” That scared her. She said the good ones have already left the country and she knows three who have just left for Singapore. She said at least if we get to PGH or UST she knows we’re in good hands. It’s dangerous to be under a mediocre doctor under the circumstances my daughter was in at that time.

Now back to the radiologist. We knew the radiologist here before, he was my older sister’s high school classmate. But since he is a product of Harvard Med, his services have been more in demand in big Metro Manila hospitals so he had to give up his practice here. The only reason why he goes here is because of his parents who still live here, as well as his in-laws since his wife is my high school classmate who is a dermatologist here. Since then, radiology reading has to be scheduled because they don’t have a radiologist here everyday. Hence the delay in my CT scan result.

I’m much better now, albeit there is still some tenderness in the upper abdomen. I guess this is a result of the massive muscle spasms I had when I was deep in pain the past few days. My gastroenterologist said what he was giving me are already meds for ulcer. If I still have aches and pains, then it might be caused by a stone or two stuck in the bile duct where my gall bladder was attached to before its removal in 2014. He said my initial blood tests showed that there is some yellowness in my blood. So they ran some more tests to check my liver.

He didn’t explain anymore but I guess my bilirubin is high, therefore, it’s not eliminated. My urine is deep yellow, so it could indicate presence of bilirubin.

What he said though that if there is indeed blockage in my bile duct, I would have to undergo ERCP, which is not performed in this hospital. I would have to transfer to Medical City, Asian Hospital or St Luke’s (I think). 🤦🏻‍♀️

I just hope the CT scan shows there is no blockage but it’s just peptic ulcer, which can be cured with meds and involves careful diet for the healing of the gut.

Let’s wait for the CT scan

Finally going home!!!

Nothing in my CT scan, it’s clean. So it was just a very bad acute gastritis. All the build up of stress, fatty/oily food and caffeine landed me here. Plus I’m no longer in my 20s to be able to recover quickly from such ordeal. Whew!

Thank you, Lord.

I vomited at the CT scan.

My condition was so bad that I had to hurl all the contrast liquid I had imbibed earlier. Then I had enema to have contrast liquid in my colon.

So why all this?

I was rushed to the hospital yesterday early evening after hours of twitching in pain on my bed. I wanted to vomit, thinking that vomiting could relieve me of the searing pain slicing through the upper right quadrant of my abdomen that radiated through my back. I tried inducing it but I couldn’t puke. I was in so much pain that I could barely breathe.

At the ER I was already screaming in pain, twitching, and thrashing on the bed. They had to inject a lot of meds in me like proton pump inhibitor, pain killer, and another one that made drowsy. That somewhat quieted me down. Pain was 10/10.

Initial diagnosis was acute gastritis but CT scan is needed to rule out pancreatitis, peptic ulcer, or GERD. My insurance company called me to say, yeah, we can cover that.

The entire night I was moaning and twitching in my bed. They couldn’t relieve my pain because my gastroenterologist said they couldn’t give me more meds and had to wait for a few more hours.

Then at 3 am, I hurled everything I ate the previous day after I was injected with Tramadol.

Pain subsided from 10/10 to 6-7/10. But it was still enough to cause me to scream in pain whenever I moved. I felt like my midsection was rolling and twisting inside me while pain jabbed at the spot.

At 4 am, I vomited again all the acids left in my gut. That relieved me somewhat, which allowed me to sleep for a bit before they prepped me for my CT scan.

After the scan, I felt a little bit ok, enough for me to take a shower and clean off my vomit. I felt human again.

Pain is around 2/10, dull but consistent. I hope it stays that way. I have to wait until tomorrow for the results. I don’t want to stay here another day.

My stairs weren’t that dark anymore after I installed the Christmas lantern and lights. I got home to this view this morning from night out with high school classmates.

I attended the annual fundraiser/homecoming of my high school to catch up with friends. After the main event, we went to our usual after-party party and this time, we’re now the titos and titas who just gather around the coffee table and have tame drinks. We were just talking about how things have changed from our annual nights out ten to 15 years ago that translated to bad hangovers the next day. We now were chatting about how to deal with our adolescent children, sexual education, teen dating, etc. We turned into that kind of parents. 🤦🏻‍♀️ HAHAHAHA! I never would have imagined that we would come to this but here we are. 🤣

I always made sure my children are well fed before I fly off. This was our breakfast yesterday. I had to empty our fridge this week because it is still stuffed with different kinds of bread. I gotta make room for Christmas holiday food.

And this is our breakfast today. Enjoying it with Vitamin D as it is a lovely morning.

I spoke too soon. Damn.