It has been a rough week.

I think half of my problem with that editor from the land of bubblegum pop is miscommunication. English is not her strong suit so 1) the tone is very harsh maybe because her first language is harsh or not polite, 2) she thinks I’m stupid for always misunderstanding her 3) she is harsh by nature.

So many lines are crossed. My skin jumps when I see her in my emails and chats.

Anyway, I’m just buying time. I’m figuring a way out. If I don’t get the two jobs I applied for, then I will have to figure out how to get two consulting contracts.

It’s the weekend; I’m driving to Batangas tomorrow and then to Caliraya on Sunday. To drive the cobwebs away.

Went back to civilization today to interview (I got two!) and to schedule several prospects. I need to draft three stories tomorrow to meet minimum requirement while on edit duty. I don’t know what supernatural powers I must activate to survive that.

I submitted my application to two jobs last night. I got so frustrated with my editor from the land of bubblegum pop, who held up two of my stories and rejected one. My cortisol went through the roof yesterday.

I can’t go on like this.

I mean, I quit being a team leader because I thought that was the source of all my anxiety and depression.

Nope.

It’s her.

And if I get either one of those two jobs, I must hire a driver because it’s an office-bound role.

Goodbye. It has been a good 12 years.

But if I don’t get either one, then I must endure bit more. 😵‍💫

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@iamshainamartin

Am I trippin?!?! Tell me this ain’t sus!!! Hawaii is literally a “melting pot” where people from all over the world come to visit and many never go back to where they came from. #sus #stopthebullshit #nooneissafe

♬ original sound – G7❌ShainaMartin❌74

Are you kidding me?! Hawaii is literally stolen land by the US. Then they are being terrorized by ICE — land that is populated by natives, Filipinos (mostly Ilocanos brought by the Americans to plantations), Japanese, and Latinos. The white people are the immigrants there, idiots!

The anger and terror that they feel are similar to how we felt during the Duterte years. The thing though is that American media is complicit while Philippine media pushed back against fascism. That’s why some colleagues won the Pulitzer Prize. I was also a victim of the Duterte machinery in 2019, all the harassment from trolls and being singled out by some cabinet members after I pushed back against them.

All the media reports and documentation we produced were used to help bring Duterte to The Hague. The diligent human rights lawyers and rights fighters worked nonstop to bring justice to the likes of Kian and countless others who were killed without mercy.

My MAGA uncle is flying here in July with his entire brood and he is asking for help in booking a house and van for rent. I don’t think I’m thrilled to meet up with them. He once declared Trump’s second term is like the second coming of Jesus as he will save America. 🤮

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I just drove this afternoon to the dorm of my scholar to give him some groceries, medicines, an electric kettle, and a hand-me-down cellphone that no one uses at home.

I’m financially supporting a UP student by paying for his meals via a food program for indigent students and pocket money for fare/cellphone load/school requirements every month until he graduates.

His parents are street vendors and they really can’t spare him anything, maybe jusy PhP 400 a month on average. When they get swiped by the police or whatever when the LGU conducts street clearing operations, his parents don’t have anything to bring home.

He already developed ulcer because he couldn’t eat well (that’s why I bought him 14 days worth of proton pump inhibitors).

Yes, UP equalizes opportunities for rich and poor Filipinos but the odds are still stacked against the poor students, especially if they can’t eat. It’s hard to get scholarships because these require high grades. How can you get high grades when you don’t get to eat in a day?! These kids are reliant on private food programs and there aren’t many.

I told my scholar that I won’t ask for anything. As long as he graduates, even if it’s not on time, it’s good enough for me.

Twin A asked me, Mommy, why are you doing this? (Just genuine curiosity). I told her, “Anak, we are so blessed. We have more than enough for our needs so that we can be a blessing to others.” Keeping more than what we need and accumulating it is called hoarding. There’s so much inequality and hunger around us that it’s almost a crime to hoard resources to one’s self.

I’m teaching my children how to love other people as they love themselves.

I got the first dibs. 🤣

This is my 19th year attending this annual event at the central bank and, of course, I had to be there.

Aside from the stories I would get (that I desperately needed) from this event, I also wanted to see the art pieces that are in rotation and the Brutalist architecture of the PICC.

I can have these framed in a shadow box.

And as usual, I brought home the table decor 🤣

As usual, we journalists are the ones left behind. The catering service crew was already wrapping up, we were still hanging out by the tables, drinking wine and taking selfies. For almost 20 years… 🙌

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How dare they call it an Ibiza skirt/blouse?! Ibiza has nothing to do with capiz!

Capiz shell came from the Placuna placenta mollusk, indigenous to the Philippines. That’s why we have a province named after this shell. It’s also called window pane oyster because we use the shell in our windows instead of glass. Once you see these capiz windows, you know it’s Filipino or you’re in the Philippines. We made these shells into so many things like lamps, wall decor, plates, clocks, clutches/evening bags, jewelry, and adornments in clothes.

And how dare they call it Ibiza skirt! They have deliberately erased the Filipino identity in this garment because we are not white. WTF!

At least they didn’t do it to our ancient martial art, the deadly Kali (or Kali-Arnis-Eskrima).

I know Filipino Martial Arts (FMA) more than your average Filipino because my ex-husband was a practitioner but he stopped going to his master because…he’s very inconsistent. Just like what he was with Brazilian Jiu Jitsu.

Anyway, I became familiar with the names of the grandmasters and some famous practitioners like Dan Inosanto who popularized FMA in the US. His most famous student was Bruce Lee (who invented his own martial art, Jeet Kune Do). It was Inosanto who taught Bruce Lee how to use the nunchaku. Inosanto was also a consultant in some films for fight choreography, especially involving empty hand fighting and knives, and US Navy SEALs.

The ex and I sold FMA magazines on ebay that were published in the Philippines. One of the prolific writers of that magazine became a colleague of mine in a newspaper some years later.

We also sold books and other FMA paraphernalia like arnis sticks, also on ebay. I remember we made a killing with the books about FMA weapons that became out of print. Our profit margins were very attractive. We also sold other FMA books written by other masters or students of known Grandmasters.

We learned arnis in elementary school. It replaced sepak takraw (which we called sipa in Tagalog) as the national sport some years later. I think this is now required in all DepEd-run schools and UP is also teaching this now. A friend is a faculty of sports science teaching this FMA. But that is the sport side of FMA.

The real deal looks like this — only taught in the military because it is for killing — unlike karate or judo or taekwondo, which are more for street fighting or self-defense. This is how our military trained; this is also how our own Marines train US Marines in hand-to-hand combat and jungle warfare.

Ancient Filipinos are terrifying practitioners of Kali/Eskrima (that’s why idiot Ferdinand Magellan died) that the Spaniards outlawed the use of swords/blades like the kampilan, when practicing it.

Little did the conquistadores know that Filipinos can still be deadly even just using arnis sticks (yantok/rattan sticks). We invented the butterfly knife a.k.a balisong, which is illegal to carry outside the house, just like a gun. We Batangueños are deadly like that (we also have the kumintang, a war song that originated from the province of my ancestors).

We’re deadly — do not erase our culture like that.