Yesterday I died, tomorrow’s bleeding Fall into your sunlight The future’s open wide, beyond believing To know why hope dies And losing what was found, a world so hollow Suspended in a compromise But the silence of this sound is soon to follow But somehow sundown
And finding answers is forgetting all of the Questions we call home Passing the graves of the unknown
As reason clouds my eyes with splendor fading Illusions of the sunlight A reflection of a lie will keep me waiting with love gone for so long
And this day’s ending is the proof of time killing all the faith I know Knowing that faith is all I hold
And I’ve lost who I am, and I can’t understand Why my heart is so broken, rejecting your love Without, love gone wrong; lifeless words carry on But I know, all i know is that the end’s beginning Who I am from the start, take me home to my heart Let me go and I will run, I will not be silent All this time spent in vain; wasted years wasted gain All is lost but hope remains and this war’s not over There’s a light, there’s a sun taking all these shattered ones To the place we belong, and his love will conquer all
Yesterday I died, tomorrow’s bleeding Fall into your sunlight
Been swimming in David Hodges (including Trading Yesterday, Arrows to Athens) songs the past 48 hours. I don’t know why. I haven’t listened to him in years. Maybe because he has been very apt for the past few days.
It’s Monday again; it’s such a struggle to be productive but against all odds I was. There was a “little” mishap during today’s press conference not of my doing (never trust other people to do their jobs well) but I still managed to salvage what could be salvaged and still end up triumphant. But I ended up rushing a time-sensitive story, rushing to publish ahead of competition. I hedged an article related to this one last week, which was a good call since today could have gone another way. My 20-year experience always gets tested in situations like these.
I had to grab one bottle of Smirnoff to calm me down after the hectic day I’ve had. I had to finish another very long article today that was already overdue while trying to rush that time-sensitive story. And my editing jobs had piled up on me from last Friday.
All I wanted was to float today.
I wanted to process so many things today but life gets in the way.
Like you know, you can’t stop the world from turning just because yours already stopped but your children’s worlds continue to move on. You cannot die even if you’re already dead because your children need to go on living. You cannot afford to be suspended in air because your children need you. You have no choice but to be strong when you just want to buckle and give in. Because you’re tired of fighting. But fight you must, for your children.
Thus is the life of a solo parent. You carry the weight of the world and that is yours alone to bear.
A colleague, who is my junior, and I were talking about our past lives as online journalists for a TV network. She was saying she missed it, the camaraderie and the achievements that we had, the kind of coverage that we did. She said she missed writing for an audience who would care about what she is writing about.
Writing with meaning. Writing about things that matter.
As I said before, we are writing for money now. Not our money but rather money for our readers–exclusive content that would make them money. It’s not writing with a noble purpose.
I think every writer at some point looks for the soul of what she is writing about.
I had quit that for a while. I gave so much of myself in that last job before this one that I got burnt out. I was headbutting government officials, the government, the world. The country’s problems were my problems. I was a walking mass of nerves. If my insurance covered my jumping out of planes, I would have but my editor strapped me to my chair and said, do something less wild, ok?
I was doing investigative reports. Knocking on doors upon doors, literally, looking for the people in the web of lies I have mapped out. I conducted interviews in the dark, in safe houses, having multiple phones with me just in case one of them gets bugged. I hung out in court houses, listened to court proceedings, pored over evidence and more evidence. I talked to people who were willing to give me evidence. We were almost there, almost sent the criminals to jail. They were indicted. Senators. Ring leaders.
Then it all came to naught. Things got reversed. It’s so tiring. Fighting for justice in this country is tiring.
And then I became a casualty of mergers and acquisitions. The parent company had done a series of bolt-on acquisitions that made my role redundant…even though it didn’t seem like it at first. But as a business journalist, I already saw the writing on the wall. I exited before it happened. After a couple years after I left, it did finally happen. All of them were shown the exit door.
Did I miss it? Yes, I do miss writing from the soul. Do I miss my former life? I don’t know. Maybe the burnout hasn’t worn off yet. The disillusionment has not worn off yet.
I was offered to write a weekly column in a broadsheet some years ago. My boss in HK said, why not? It would have been great marketing for my current company as well. But I turned it down, thinking I would not be able to commit writing that regularly. I may run out of things to say. As it turned out, I was right. It’s not that I would run out of things to say but I ran out of time. I don’t have enough time for everything. Especially in the last 3 years when I was running around with J. I barely had time for myself. A weekly column would have been a chore and I may just churn out something that would be subpar, with no real purpose or meaning.
I was watching this video of of a girl who quit her job to become a full-time artist. It was like her day job was sucking out her soul but she was doing the math and she stayed in her job year in and year out to be able to save enough, create a portfolio of work, gather clients for commissioned work, and students. Then she made the leap and was happy that she was able to do it sooner than she was thinking.
I completely sympathize with her. I was stuck in jobs in other industries for a couple of years before I made a jump to full-time journalism and not just dabbling in writing here and there. At that time I was writing on the side–to keep my spirit alive while I stayed in soul-sucking jobs to put me through graduate school.
Now years later I’m still working at home as a writer. Not that kind of writer that people are romanticizing about, like Hemingway or Nick Joaquin. But writer nonetheless.
Maybe I should restructure my colleague’s question: Do I miss writing about things that matter? Yes. Do I miss the former life of a mad-dash journalist out there in the trenches? Sometimes. What do I want to do to feed my soul?
Maybe I should write on the side. Of things that mattered.
I got an invite to write for a news outlet, a special report about healthcare. I haven’t done it yet because it required too much leg work.
I must pick my battles. Start small. Write in a literary magazine for a start while I write big stuff for my day job.
Oh, and this is the reason why I blog regularly. My writing sucks most of the time because I’ve been stuck writing for my day job for seven years. My writing growth was stymied. I regressed.
Here is something I wrote five years ago about this searching for the soul:
Long form journalism in the click-bait era
Let me tell you about the moment I realized I wanted to be a journalist. We had in our house a desk calendar from the Philippine Center for Investigative Journalism (PCIJ). That calendar had a black and white photo for every month, which I presumed was used in some PCIJ story. I cropped those photos to use in one of my projects for xxx (subject) during my freshman year in college. And somewhere in my gut I knew I wanted to be a journalist after flipping through the pages of my finished project.
All The President’s Men and now Spotlight reinforced my desire to be and stay in this profession.
I cried at the end of the movie. The most poignant part of the film was when Micheal Keaton entered Spotlight’s office and saw the phones ringing off the hooks. He was probably expecting calls from angry parishioners and supporters of the Catholic Church (hence his surprised remark about the absence of picketers the day after the Boston Globe ran the story). But no, these were calls from victims of sexual abuse perpetrated by Catholic priests in Boston. These victims were coming forward to tell their tales, emboldened by Boston Globe’s investigative story on how the church covered up decades of sexual abuse. That for me was the most powerful scene–the reason why we journalists do what we have to do. Marty Baron (Liev Schreiber) was right: you don’t focus on the individual stories because nothing will come out of it. You have to go after the system, the system that was so rotten that it has killed so many children who were silenced by shame, guilt and haunting memories of predators. And good journalism serves as a spark that would lead to the correction of that faulty system.
Sadly, dwindling advertising money and the audience’s propensity to gobble up “fastfood” news are whittling down the capacity of newspapers to carry the long form, good ol’ shoe-leather stories.
Keeping an investigative team is expensive. Running stories that may not bring you “hits” or mouse clicks is kind of hard these days. Doing investigative reports is exhausting, and at times you feel like you are alone in your battle. I’ve been there. Countless late nights interviewing sources undercover. Poring over documents and piecing together clues then hitting a brick wall. Sacrificing family life just to be able to bring out the truth to the public is painful. But what keeps us journalists going? Mark Ruffalo has put it perfectly:
“They knew. They let it happen. To kids! Okay? It could’ve been you! It could’ve been me! It could’ve been any of us! We gotta nail these scumbags! We’ve gotta show the people nobody can get away with this! Not a priest, not a cardinal, or a freaking pope!”
“Spotlight” was devoid of histrionics that made the horrific story that was unfolding so palpable. It was a methodical movie but was a great thriller. It didn’t dwell on the heartbreaking stories of the victims, but by doing so “Spotlight” made each stories of those children more devastating.
Spotlight is an ode to newspapers and to the journalists dying to stay in the profession. To the journalists who fight for change.
A friend from way, way back was seeking my professional advice (via Zoom) how she could jumpstart her business development work for an advisory firm in Singapore since my job runs alongside hers. I am very familiar with her line of work even though she is in the legal sector. I gave her the step by step how she should do the three prongs under her departments. (Maybe I should do this for a living 🤔)
Long story short, she told me she was getting a lot of resistance from her subordinates, like they don’t believe in her. She had to assert herself to her subordinates and told that she is a lawyer, a CPA, and and MBA holder who graduated from one of Singapore’s top schools and that she has every right to be in that firm.
I told her the ugly truth: Singaporeans look down on Filipinos and they think you should not have been in your position. Then I saw in her face that it finally dawned on her what that was all about. Like it finally made sense to her why she is receiving this kind of hostility from rank and file staff. They only view us as maids and office cleaning ladies. I get that all the time, I told her. And if I tell them I am Filipino, they would insist I must be part Chinese. An ex-colleague in Hong Kong said the same. Then a Singaporean challenged me, my editing, my English… I just let it go. She didn’t last because she couldn’t cope.
So I told my friend that is the reason why I always had to assert myself, that I am as good, if not better, than others. Most Filipinos in our big company (there were only a handful of us) are not just rank and file; in fact we hold key positions. The head for Asia Pacific (before she left last year) was Filipino and we were contemporaries when we were still with local media. We almost had the same background. We are not mediocre. And when an editor from far away accused me of plagiarism because she could not believe an Asian, much less a Filipino, could write very well in English–and a technical finance article at that–I pushed back. I didn’t back down and gave a good fight. It reached headquarters and in the end she had to apologize to me.
As I wrote here before, J did not understand the hierarchy even among Southeast Asians. That we are the wrong kind of Asians so we always get the shorter end of the stick. I told J before that he won’t feel it because he is the “right” kind of Asian.
So I told this friend that she has to brace herself (she’s new in SG and her entire year she was at the university where the environment is more forgiving) because she will get a lot of that treatment so she has to fight her way through.
I guess I also have to fight my way through all the time.
Last night I had been chatting with an ex-colleague for hours while we were holding a vigil for another ex-colleague who was about to expire.
Basically we waiting for the expected and praying for his eternal peace. He got severe Covid and while in the hospital, it was discovered he had terminal liver cancer. After he was off the tubes, he was allowed to go home for palliative care. Then we were told by his family that we can send him voice messages. I wrote about this a few days ago.
So last night this ex-colleague, A, and I were talking about him. We also talked about how we got so tired fighting for what we believed in, for what is right, which our sick friend and colleague, N, did all his life. He died last night while we were talking about him.
We all cared so much for an industry that did not love us back, that we were so passionate about our profession but we got burned so many times. There was so much corruption and abuse.
So it’s about time that we should start to live our lives, she said. Start preparing for retirement. She told me I was one of the few very good and clean journalists whom she wanted to stand out and do more great things but the system is so rotten that she understands why I turned my back on it. I told her I went to the extreme end; at least my niche is unapologetic about serving the corporate big machine and no pretense that this kind of journalism is the crusading kind. That it is upfront about being all about making money for our audience. That’s why I can be emotionally detached from it. Just bring my skills and produce good stories and that’s it. It was no longer about saving the world.
Every now and then I still do take up the cudgels, when the messiah syndrome comes knocking. One day I can go back to it. In another form. In some way or another.
A and I were talking about retiring into our small homes, growing our own food, living sustainably away from the city. She will go home to Mindanao while I am still figuring out where I want to go. My girls and I could end up in my hometown, or near the sea, or in Hyogo Prefecture, or outside Utrecht, or somewhere.
I’m no longer trying to reach the highest level in the ladder nor chasing accolades and titles…But I haven’t really been chasing them in the first place. I only felt pressured to do so when J came into my life because it was what he was chasing after. It was the time I questioned myself, what was I doing with my life? Why am I just stuck as a journalist when I can be doing something in the finance world?
Then when he dumped me, I began to question again what was really my core? What is my essence? What do I want to do for the rest of my life?
Peace. I want peace and contentment. I want to live a life, my life, and not chase somebody else’s dream for them.
So I am working towards that goal now. I don’t know how but I know I will get there.
Every now and then it does occur to me that I can pivot and do what my other ex-colleagues are doing now. My ex-boss in HK (also came from here, we were in the same circle when she was still here in the country) is now a managing director in an advisory firm, which I can do as well if I devote more years into this company to reach some milestones to fatten up my resume. Another friend who also came from a hardcore journalism background is now doing partnership deals for a fintech company. Which I think I can also do.
Now the question is, do I want to do it? Let’s see what the wind may bring. All I know is I want peace and to live my life. To have time to stop and smell the roses.
And write.
I am waiting.
When things are meant for me, they just fall on my lap. Let’s see what happens.
I’m back to sewing masks. I think we will soon run out of Greek letters to distinguish each SARS-COV-2 variant that keeps popping up every month. We now have Lambda, which was first detected in Peru and has now infiltrated 30 countries. So the future masks that I will finish would have a long time of service, unfortunately.
Today was a bit terrible. That interview I did at 5 pm got me triggered. The interviewee was nice and all, nothing was wrong with him and I got everything I needed for a story but at the same time he was all wrong. Very wrong.
He was same age as J, from J’s country of birth (when I thought my interviewee was from somewhere else), migrated to the same country where J migrated at a young age too. Same state and same city. He was relating his history because I asked why he built up his company in this particular segment. Then he told the same backstory of being compared to the neighbor academically, strict upbringing, going to xxx university for pre-med but dropped to go into military. Had a younger brother who went into law school but ended up in MIT. The two of them formed a company in Asia, sold it to a PE and the proceeds allowed them to run a family office investing in two sectors and then they also founded another start-up and now doing a capital growth fundraise. That’s how I ended up interviewing him.
He was so talkative that in 1.5 hrs he already related his political views and the racism he experienced growing up in the same city as J. He said stones were thrown at him when he was a kid and was often told to go home to China. He said, “I shot back and said I am not Chinese, I am xxx and I live in this country.” He said the same thing as J said, that Asians are invisible and are at the bottom rung when it comes to large ethnic groups.
Just as I was getting successful in forgetting and moving on, I suddenly slipped and fell and was back to square one. This interview triggered the memories of J telling me all those stories. Of memories of J.
Stop it. He has forgotten about you. He doesn’t like you. He lied to you about many things. He took you for an idiot. He’s a terrible person. Don’t go back into that dark pit again. Just stop.
So now I’m back to sewing while watching/listening to Youtube to take my mind off everything. I wish I can hold the fort and not crumble.
It is a heavy Monday. I was drowning in work. I again forgot to have lunch and only remembered to eat at 3 pm.
Then I said goodbye to a friend and colleague who has begun sleeping to never wake up.
How do you say goodbye to someone who is dying? What do you say? I was at a loss for words but I knew I needed to say something. His family says he still can hear as hearing is the last of the senses to go before one crosses the rainbow.
So we sent our recorded voice messages via FB Messenger or email. I told him I hope he realizes how much we love him and appreciate how he touched our lives. That I know he will continue fighting for our rights as journalists, as human beings. That he shouldn’t worry because we will carry the torch after he moves on, that we will fight his fight, that the fight will continue.
I always jokingly post on FB that I need him to keep me company trolling the trolls on Twitter.
I told him I hope he is no longer hurting and that he is happy with what he has now and what he has accomplished.