Good thing I had the brakes adjusted this afternoon because I had an impromptu drive to SM Sto. Tomas this evening. I had to go back to Acer there to have my mom’s laptop checked because one of the latest Microsoft updates has a fatal bug that rendered the OS unusable. Windows Explorer keeps on hanging. I don’t know if it was a late Crowdstrike update or an equally devastating one. I had been tinkering with it and was trying to get to Task Manager but the whole thing freezes. I could have reset MS at BIOS but my mom insisted that we go back to Acer, so I couldn’t argue. Besides I couldn’t extract the files before resetting the laptop.

So off we went but it was late, the service center guys already went home and only the sales team were there. 😩

I have to go tomorrow morning to the nearest Acer Service Center, which is luckily in our town. My mom is nagging me to have it done earliest tomorrow morning because she has a meeting at 1 pm. As if files extraction and Windows reset are quick. 😣

After weeks of constant rains, we’re given a fair weather today. Perfect for cardio exercises.

It was refreshing, after being locked up for days because of the southwestern monsoon rains. I was motivated to be more serious with my weight loss program after ranting on this blog the other day.

And of course, I want to catch the sunset outside.

It’s so easy to fall back into bed after a day of exhausting my brain doing admin and editorial stuff. Attended an online press briefing and filed a story right after. I only got to have my lunch at 2 pm because I couldn’t let go of the story until I submitted it to the editors. I also edited a rush story, which was a quick job but I had rewritten some paragraphs since the reporter wrote the story on her phone since she didn’t bring her laptop, thinking there wouldn’t be a time-sensitive story from the event she has been to.

During my 4km+ walk, I passed by the former site of my elementary school, which is now taken over by the university. My elementary school was private, which was owned by the PTA, but was leasing land from the university. It was founded by the same people who helped establish this university, ergo the Americans. The school has relocated to the next town, where large tracts of land could still be purchased.

Anyway, many school events were held on this mini-stage and the adjacent grounds. Several of these events were singing contests. Of course, I joined them and it didn’t enter my mind that I wasn’t good enough. Hahahaha! The audacity of the younger version of me!

We had a bigger stage on the other side of this complex where we had our recognition rites and several stage presentations. I clearly remember I had been voted to play Gloria Estefan and lipsync that Seal Our Fate song with backup dancers in 6th Grade. It was 1991 or 1992. I had a photo of that event held on the bigger stage. I felt so humiliated by that performance and I thought my classmates hated me that’s why they made me do it.

Hahaha! Memories that are almost 40 years old.

Sigh.

I’m cooling down in my balcony now. My world has gotten smaller again.

I’m not angry at the caller; I always expect men to be shallow. I’m angry at the comments in this video. They’re getting under my skin.

Men do not understand that women’s bodies morph and get destroyed during pregnancy. Carrying humans inside us once or multiple times can really stretch us out of shape. Carrying multiple babies at the same time can literally kill us. Breastfeeding babies for several months to a year will make our  boobs sag. Breastfeeding mutiple babies at the same time will make our boobs into sad sacs of fats. They will never be perky again. Ever. Unless  husbands give us money for a boob job.

Our  bodies will never be the same again. Men will have to accept that.

Hormones and the ravages of pregnancy will make sure we will never be our old selves again.

On top of these, add the stress of 1) raising mini parasitic humans, constantly clinging to us literally and figuratively; and 2) mental burden of keeping the house in order while 3) earning a living. Mothers are already spent by 8 pm. We really are dead in heart, mind, and body by that time. We don’t have the bandwidth to even have a walk around the neighborhood for 30 mins. Those who are lucky to maintain a slim figure post-pregnancy until kids are 15 years old are those 1) with husbands who help them raise kids and keep the house in order i.e. husbands who equally share the burden of raising a family and keep the household intact; 2) rich with a lot of maids and do not have to work for a living and have all the time to spend in the gym; 3) rich enough to be able to go to plastic surgeons and enroll in Marie France and some weight loss and toning spa; 4)  won the genetic lottery.

How dare the husbands demand that we keep our 20-year-old bodies after baking kids in our ovens for 9 months—the kids the husbands demanded without having to go through all the horror of being pregnant and giving birth and being sleepless for 2 years because infants wake up every 2-3 hrs! How dare they demand that we should keep our hips at 36″ when we had to eat for three people to keep two humans inside us alive for months! If we could only shrink back our hips to 36, we would! How dare they demand that we go to the gym to do an hour of cardio and resistance training after waking up at 5 am, cooking breakfast for everybody, making sure the kids get to school fed and clean, making sure the husband is well turned up going to work. And we still have to go fix ourselves, barely fed, to get to our workplace on time. Yet these husbands do not even help clear the table and wash dishes!!!

We are already exhausted by mid-day, man! Gym or running around the neighborhood is least of our priorities. If we are no longer  worrying about what to cook for dinner, taking care of laundry, or cleaning up after our kids, then we’ll talk about gym. We’ll talk about special low-calorie diet. We’ll talk about yoga and pilates.

How dare they demand that we shrink our bodies when we are suffering from hormonal imbalance because we have polycystic ovarian syndrome (PCOS)!

I am still fat despite my OB-gyn applauding my blood work because I managed to keep myself healthy, except for the insulin resistance due to PCOS and/or genetics. She was amazed by my discipline when it comes to cholesterol/diet.

But I’m still fat.

We mothers struggle so much with negative body image and low self-esteem because of shallow husbands. If you want a hot wife, then don’t demand to have kids, or work yourself to death to afford maids and drivers, or help with the fucking child-rearing and household chores!

Fucking morons.

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Yes, I am angry and the trauma of being told that I’m losyang and my boobs are droopy and ugly never left me. Told by a man who passive-aggressively demanded to have kids but didn’t lift a finger in helping raise them.

I was so brainwashed that I believed I was ugly and I was already checking Belo for contact details so I can ask for a bust lift and liposuction. I went for brisk walks, doing two Academic Ovals in UP Diliman for under an hour despite exhaustion from work because I felt I was repulsive to look at.

It took me 6 years before I felt I am beautiful.

To the men in the comments section of that YouTube video, FUCK YOU!

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It’s so hard to laugh out loud if you’re watching in the theater alone. I just contained myself in giggles and suppressed laughter and let my chair do all the shaking for me.

https://youtu.be/PXfnwH7cU5g?si=FnP2zo3YPa3M5BSz

I watched Deadpool & Wolverine while my girls are with their elementary bffs, roaming around Shangri-la Plaza. The story is light-weight, just an excuse to bring back Logan from the dead. Fox already killed Wolverine but Disney (post-acquisition of Fox) resurrected him, which could open a lot of possibilities. This movie also brought to life Gambit, with his real-to-character Cajun accent, albeit exaggerated since they were in The Void.

Elektra and Blade were there as well. Blade is the real Marvel Jesus, not Deadpool. Marvel was on the brink of bankruptcy when it released Blade and the first movie was a sleeper hit. It saved Marvel.

Anyway, it was a fun movie that one shouldn’t take seriously. You wouldn’t get the jokes if you’re not up-to-date with pop culture.

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I braved the weekend traffic to Metro Manila so that my kids can meet their gradeschool friends.

As much as I want to lie down and chill in bed the whole Saturday, I can’t deny my girls the chance to see their friends.

After we went our separate ways (I left them at Starbucks with friend #1), I occupied myself by visiting the art galleries at Shangri-la.

No, I didn’t buy anything. I don’t need more painting and writing supplies… 🫠

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Wooohooo breaking news!

My hair stood on its ends while our national anthem played.

The awarding of the golden boy, Carlos Yulo!!! Lupang Hinirang being played!!! 😭😭😭🇵🇭 #Paris2024 #Olympics pic.twitter.com/Wqm2cPivmY

— Aries (@_buenosaries) August 3, 2024

Yusuf Dikeç, the Turkish badass ex-military Olympian, went viral in 24 hrs for winning silver medal for shooting an air pistol casually like like John Wick. Or these badasses from Pulp Fiction. He had no special equipment, just ordinary eye glasses and ear plugs, and his hand in his pocket like it was nothing. In contrast, his opponents had special glasses like in some sci-fi movie.

And of course the interwebs went crazy and you know they will be turned into memes or anime within that 24-hr period. 🤣

Meanwhile, here’s another badass, the legendary Chad Smith of Red Hot Chilli Peppers, playing for Drumeo. Completely improvising drums on the fly on a song he has never heard before.

I will always love Drumeo for showing me how awesome drummers are.

After a press briefing today in Makati, I went straight to Yupangco music store to buy the piano stand that I’ve been eyeing for two years. I straightaway ordered the model I wanted and threw in a sturdier sustain pedal for good measure.

Good thing my car is big enough (with second row seats folded) to accommodate this heavy thing.

While deciding whether I want the single sustain pedal or the three-pedal attachment, I played the baby grand pianos that are as expensive as a down payment for a house.

You can hear the differences in sound quality as you go higher in price. The more expensive ones are 👌✨.

I fell in-love with this electric baby grand piano. It’s a lot smaller than the acoustic baby grand piano but it sounded like one but the latter has a richer tone. It can fit where you can fit an old upright piano.

I played and played and finally decided to get the single pedal since I never used the soft and the sostenuto pedals anyway. I was like a kid in a candy store. I knew I would be spending more than planned. 🤦🏻‍♀️ The pedal and guitar stand for Twin I weren’t supposed to be in my shopping cart but here they are. 🫠

When I got home, I immediately opened the box and assembled the piano stand. I am already a veteran Ikea assembler so this might be simpler than building a wardrobe or drawer, I thought.

I dropped by SM Mall of Asia to buy cheaper guitar strings in one of the music stores there and some picks. The ones in Yupangco are for professionals.

I also needed to get Twin A new backpack since Twin I got a hand-me-down High Sierra school bag from her paternal cousin. Also picked up fairy lights and lanterns from Ikea as requested by my girls. They wanted to decorate their study areas to welcome the new school year.