We arrived here with our entire lives packed in boxes on the 16th of May last year. For the rest of the month, I was navigating through boxes and crates of our stuff. By June, I was able to tame the chaos but we were still unpacking, sorting, throwing or giving away stuff. My staircase was still being finished, my laundry area was still dirt.

One year later, I no longer have boxes, things are off the floor now, but I still don’t have a vegetable garden. All the things I told myself I would be doing didn’t really materialize. I didn’t realize that all of my time would be eaten up by cleaning, cooking, and keeping chaos to a minimum. 🤦🏻‍♀️

Being near family is a blessing and a curse. Skirmishes arise, like the matter of foster cats, so it is a good thing my walls are thick and soundproof so it feels like a totally different world out here.

Giving my girls more independence is much easier here since they don’t have to depend on me driving them to places all the time. They can move about on their own as everything is walkable or a short jeep ride away.

I’m still getting used to this life. I’m not used to having to chase businesses, like salons and car wash places, as they close by 5 pm. I have forgotten that they keep provincial hours here; I’m so used to Metro Manila where businesses can service customers until 7 or 8 pm, restaurants can be open until 9 pm or 10 pm. There are no more jeeps at 7 pm here. 🤦🏻‍♀️

I don’t remember being bothered by this when I was still living here 25 years ago.

So far I’m loving it here. I didn’t realize the extent of my exhaustion of the city could be this bad.

I don’t need to justify my existence.

I don’t have to work so hard…I may lose all the joy and playfullness in life, making it not worth living.

It’s explained here in this reel, which is a part of a longer podcast about validation and living a better life.

This need for validation was the one that screwed me up in the first place. I sought validation from the wrong people and I ended up dying. I killed a part of me. However, the moment I chose me by never begging for someone to return or totally cutting off communication is a way to wean me from seeking validation from others. Otherwise, I would continue to be a doormat and be used over and over.

It’s the simplest of joys that could erase the need for validation. Choose yourself—make yourself happy.